Musings and thoughts

2011-10-19T22:08:00.001+08:00

stop.

Just for a second.

Just stop.

and air goes through your chapped lips,

and your heart whimpers behind the cages of your ribs

and your eyes begin to quench.

It feels like someone’s gutted you,

cut you up into little fragments

and left you bleeding.

but you’re not.

you’re not bleeding

even your blood shrivels and shudders

away from you

cause you’re not worth it.

you don’t measure up.

you’ll never be it

you’ll never be enough

you’re just another disappointment

and your teeth chews your lips

and your fingers are clawing your skin

and your throat’s constricting

It’s like being stabbed repeatedly

and the worst part is that you know it’s coming

cause it always does and you want it to stop.

but you don’t beg.

you don’t beg. you don’t say anything.

you don’t. you take it as it comes

and stay quiet on the floor.

cause no one cares.

They can see your pain through your lying smile

hears it in your forced laughter

feel it in every touch you have.

but they don’t. and you don’t blame them.

you’re a screw up

you’re a problem

you’re a mistake

so you lay there,

no scream no whimper no sound

alone. unwanted. broken.

Just writings.

2011-08-16T16:33:00.001+08:00

You stare into nothing … and hear everything.

Not everything, not the roar of a car’s ignition, or the tapping of fingers on a table, or even the quiet whistle of the wind.

No, not everything.

But something; you hear all the little voices, the shouts and the screams wailing inside your head. So dark and taunting these thoughts, they go through your mind like a deep vortex, forever making chaos.

'everything is over’

‘out of control’

‘abandoned’

Your heart squeezes, as uneasiness etches its territory over your brain. Anxiety will never leave you, it’s your only constant companion.

Not family, not friends, but anxiety.

And darkness, cause you were always dark, a shade darker from good.

Evil. Bad. Cruel. Weird. Different.Disturbed.Difficult. Annoying. Ruthless. Calculating. Manipulative.

The list goes on. And that’s all you have.

All these dark dark thoughts will never leave you.

Your one true companion.

And it’s true.

Cause everyone leaves. Everyone leaves you.

Even family.

Especially your family.

Your head starts to ache, as you think of broken plates and flying glasses. and Of grinning masks and tired eyes.

Everyone leaves you with these thoughts and feelings.

And you feel the bitter air in your lungs and the contortion of muscles, your slow marks of anger

Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop.

Breathe, breathe, breathe... and the old sting of dry tears come.

Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry.

Shh… shh…. not now, not here. Not infront of everyone.swallow.

You swallow.

Atta girl. Now, smile.

You smile.

Now, pretend everything’s alright.

You nod, you smile, and you laugh

…and you stare into nothing and hear everything.

The Fray

2010-10-28T14:35:00.003+08:00

It's been a while, hasn't it? Sorry, bout that. I know I've said it a million times, but well. i do really apologize dear blog of mine. I've just been..

busy.

Serious, it's not you, it's me.

Anyways, guess what? I FEEL LIKE SUCH A BAND WHORE. AHHHHH! Heh. Jumping from one band to another. But yeah... for a while now, The Fray's been tugging my heartstrings.. and this acoustic of one of their song explains why:

and this...

oh.. what am I kidding? This one jua!

NO NO NO WAIT!! THIS ONE!!

19th November, please come fast. I need magic.

2010-09-25T18:26:00.002+08:00

"Harry Potter is about confronting your fears, finding inner strength and doing what is right in the face of adversity. Twilight is about how important it is to have a boyfriend." - Andrew Futral

Suck on that suckas!
HAHAHAHA

TRAILER
Total love.

If I Die Young - The Band Perry

2010-09-19T22:17:00.002+08:00

Surely this a melody
in my head,
got me singing
nananana
everyday
like my brain's stuck on replay. :P

HAHAHA nothing, just playing around with songs. but on a serious note, this a song, that's gone and stick itself to my brain.
~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*

If I die young bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Sink me in the river at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song
oh oh oh oh

Lord make me a rainbow, I’ll shine down on my mother
She’ll know I’m safe with You when she stands under my colors, oh and
Life ain’t always what you think it ought to be, no
ain’t even grey, but she buries her baby

The sharp knife of a short life, well
I’ve had just enough time

If I die young bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Sink me in the river at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song

The sharp knife of a short life, well
I’ve had just enough time

And I’ll be wearing white when I come into Your kingdom
I’m as green as the ring on my little cold finger
I’ve never known the lovin’ of a man
But it sure felt nice when he was holding my hand
There’s a boy here in town says he’ll love me forever
Who would have thought forever could be severed by

The sharp knife of a short life, well
I’ve had just enough time

So put on your vest boys and I’ll wear my pearls
What I never did is done

A penny for my thoughts, oh no I’ll sell them for a dollar
They’re worth so much more after I’m gone
And maybe then you’ll hear the words I been singin’
Funny when you’re dead how people start listenin’

If I die young bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Sink me in the river at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song
oh oh

The ballad of a dove
Go with peace and love
Gather up your tears, keep ‘em in your pocket
Save them for a time when your really gonna need ‘em oh

The sharp knife of a short life, well
I’ve had just enough time

So put on your vest boys and I’ll wear my pearls.

It's been a while

2010-09-16T17:36:00.003+08:00

she sees it
even b-e-f-o-r-e it happens,
she even feels it:

skin to skin
quick
snap

she feels the c o l d
metal g r a z e her cheeks
as it happens again-

skin to skin
quick
snap

she remains nonchalantly
s t a r i n g ahead; aimless
as it happens again-

skin to skin
quick
snap

she is unfazed,
no flinch
no anything.

just a small
s c a r running
across her cheek;

a jagged reminder.

Raya

2010-09-13T00:09:00.002+08:00

Oh man. Oh gosh.

For the past few day, you had scrubbed the floors, vacuumed the carpets,wiped the windows and even planted new shrubs in that frog-infested garden, but nothing- I repeat: Nothing will ever compare to that frustrated feeling of a Flattened cake. Yes. a cake that had risen too high of it's own heated accord and burst.

A charred cake.

I is very the sad think think about it. :S SOOO change topics yes?

marked your calendars didn't you? looked up in the night sky waiting for the moon, didn'tcha? Waited with abaited breath for news on the dates, right?

yes, people. it's Raya.

Well, actually it's the 3rd day already. so this post is beyond it's due date. but well. I was busy mates. I was tryin' to clean up, bake, greet and have fun at the same time. Heh.

It's been a really weird raya, really.

Everyone seemed to have this nostalgic aura around them during 1st day of raya. Even I did. Just sitting at the living room and talking and laughing and eating, just didn't feel right. Felt a bit well... kinda felt as if everyone was expecting her to wheel in with her wheelchair complaining.....

feels weird still. but well yeah.
heh.

Anyways, after that the 2 days after that were spent raya-ing from house to house, and when we're not... HOO BOI. People come to our house.. Like seriously, one family goes, another comes, this family goes, that family comes. Anytime for rest, gone: kapoot.

Ugh.

Really tired.

really confused.

I was reading

2010-08-11T14:46:00.004+08:00

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Chapter 34 - The Forest Again.

They were neither ghost nor truly flesh, he could see that. They resembled most closely the Riddle that had escaped from the diary, so long ago, and he had been memory made nearly solid. Less substantial than living bodies, but much more than ghosts, they moved towards him, and on each face there was the same loving smile.

James was exactly the same height as Harry. He was wearing the clothes in which he had died, and his hair was untidy and ruffled, and his glasses were a little lopsided, like Mr Weasley’s.

Sirius was tall and handsome, and younger by far than Harry had seen him in life. He loped with an easy grace, his hands in his pockets and a grin on his face.

Lupin was younger too, and much less shabby, and his hair was thicker and darker. He looked happy to be back in this familiar place scene of so many adolescent wanderings.

Lily’s smile was the widest of all. She pushed her long hair back as she drew close to him, and her green eyes, so like his, searched his face hungrily as though she would never be able to look at him enough.

‘You’ve been so brave.’

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I was reading the 7th book, opened it and was met with this scene.

Loved it.

A First.

2010-08-08T15:18:00.003+08:00

It's dark, everything's dark except for the shiny screen reflecting rays of light onto the scene.

You stare blankly at said screen, admiring the CGI effects while rolling your eyes at the plain poor dialogue. You bite your lip and you steal a glance to your left. The sight you see forces you to cover your mouth in fear laughter would escape.

His hair was a stickly mess, as his mouth was a gap; he was asleep. You snicker as you grab a piece of popcorn from the bucket, and you pelt it to his mouth. You miss the target, as the butter covered popcorn hit his nose, causing him to snort awake with a start.

At this you can't help but let out a giggle. Yes, a giggle. You can't believe it, but yes you are. You had just giggled, in front of him.

He smiles at you, and you can't help but smile back before turning back to the movie ahead.

As soon as the movie ends, he brings you out to a park.

A park that was lit with multicoloured lights that changed colour every few minutes. There at the arched pavilion, he and you sit, as you continuously tell him about the 'what should've been' and 'what shouldn't have been' in the movie beforehand.

You're in the middle of talking about how the main character should've been a lot more happier, when he points out how your shoes were tied all wrong.

"A converse shoe shouldn't be tied that way, you know." he says, as he literally grabs the shoe of your foot. He then proceeds to fix the laces in what he called 'chucktaylorworthy' style, while you simply roll your eyes.

After what feels like a few minutes of him mumbling about how such a smart girl couldn't even solve a shoe lace, he decides to pamper you as he ties the laces. A tad too tight.

You voice this out, as both of you decide to walk back to the car.

He smirks at you, gives you his car keys and persuades you to drive.

You panic just a bit infront of the wheel, but he tells you to just step on the pedals.

You do

and a stream of colourful words are let out into the air, as he grabs the armrest. Looking alarmed at you as you stomp on the brakes.

Your wide eyes grow even more wider as a small smile grow on his face and he broke into a peal of laughter.

'You Suck.' is all the defence you can muster.

'You suck at driving!' he gasps in between laughter.

Both of you then switch your seats, as he continuously disses about your 'scary driving skills'

Sleep slowly sneaks upon your eyelids, and before you know it; the night's over and you're watching the hindlights of his car rearing off into the distance.

He's let you played your age, for 4 great hours

you smile.

Shattered - Trading Yesterday

2010-08-02T22:01:00.003+08:00

Lyrics:

Yesterday I died, tomorrow's bleeding
Fall into your sunlight
The future's open wide beyond believing
To know why hope dies
Losing what was found, a world so hollow
Suspended in a compromise
The silence of this sound is soon to follow
Somehow sundown

And finding answers
Is forgetting all of the questions we call home
Passing the graves of the unknown
As reason clouds my eyes, with splendor fading
Illusions of the sunlight
And the reflection of a lie will keep me waiting
Love gone for so long

This day's ending is the proof of time killing all the faith I know
Knowing that faith is all I hold

And I’ve lost who I am
And I can't understand
Why my heart is so broken
Rejecting your love
Without love gone wrong
Life-Less words
Carry on

But I know
All I know
Is that the end’s beginning

Who I am from the start
Take me home to my heart
Let me go
And I will run
I will not be silenced

All this time spent in vain
Wasted years
Wasted gain
All is lost
Hope remains
And this war's not over

There’s a light
There’s the sun
Taking all the shattered ones
To the place we belong
And his love will conquer

And I’ve lost who I am
And I can't understand
Why my heart is so broken
Rejecting your love
Without love gone wrong
Life
Less words
Carry on

But I know
All I know
Is that the ends’ beginning

Who I am from the start
Take me home to my heart
Let me go
And I will run
I will not be silenced

All this time spent in vain
Wasted years
Wasted gain
All is lost
Hope remains
And this war's not over

There’s a light
There’s the sun
Taking all the shattered ones
To the place we belong
And his love will conquer all
Yes his love will conquer all

Yesterday I died, tommorrow’s bleeding
Fall into your sunlight

100 marks the spot.

2010-06-30T20:38:00.004+08:00

You know what? They lied. They lied to all of us flat;

Time doesn't heal wounds.

Well, time hasn't healed MY wounds.

and to top THAT off, I think my nose's plugged cause I still smell that inane amount of oldpeople perfume in your room. You know, the one where we'd all sniff and make weird faces, cause it smelled so.. flowery? Yeah, weird. I know.

also.. at times, I still hear the sound of your wheelchair squeeking down the hallway. Your weird chants and random shouts still echo through the place;

even 100 days after.

and maybe i'm still a fool. but I still expect to see you, when I enter the room; taking a huff of that powdery smell in the air, listening intently for that loud snore or the ramblings you used to sing out.

cause 100 days have passed.

and I still...

heh.

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I... if there was another word for sorry, I'd be screaming it out loud now. I'd be repetitively screaming that word, that could just tell you how... I feel.

but there's none that can express to you, what I felt, what I still feel whenever I remember that scene. Oh god, only god knows what went through me at those moments. Regret and guilt interlaced with grief.

I wish I had talked to you more, spent more of my free time. Heck, I didn't even get to fulfill your wish to taste my nasi goreng cornbeef, did I? But I did, sleepover there for a night, I promised you a sleepover, didn't I? I know it was one night late, and we didn't sleep at all, cause we were all lamenting on the good days. back when you'd bake us that AWESOME cake, teach some of us how to cook, prodding us with the spatula when we were too playful in the kitchen, telling us how bad judi was while we were playing big two, and even the moments where you would tell us how it was DONE back in the old days.

'Masa nini dulu bah, tok mana ada tok, kamek, kamek kalau buat camnun-nun, pake cara tok..'

and now, 100 days have passed..

I miss you.

BadAss DeathEaters!!

2010-06-25T23:45:00.000+08:00

Let the words flow

2010-06-16T10:59:00.007+08:00

Her eyes are squinted in concentration,

frowning furrows appear on her forehead,

woven with an uprising eyebrow,

pupils dilated As her mind accelerates,

As Ecstatic fingers

readily weaving,

deliberately devising,

changing, concocting.

sidetracking everything,

for this, her creation:

to tinker with the nuts and bolt

of sentences, to find flaws and

to understand and relish the

flying sensation of liberty coursing

to and fro her veins.

She enables the channel

building a chasm between

her and her creation,

it was...

from her, to her; for her :

everything.

Running around making fools of ourselves.

2010-06-14T23:21:00.003+08:00

Past few days have been hectic.

Heck, hectic doesn't even begin to describe them.

But for the sake of saying it: 2 Weddings (1 at Brunei ICC, another at Bintulu), Roadtrip & Shopping Spree. All WITHOUT INTERNET. Ahh!!!

Heh. anyways, I'll get around on filling in my dose of intel here soon. Not Now. Drowsy after that cup of hot chocolate. from starbucks.

hmmmmmmmmmmm... nyummy.

Half a year gone.

2010-06-01T19:48:00.004+08:00

and already I feel on the edge;

I Need You,

more than ever.

GoodBye

2010-05-31T22:10:00.002+08:00

Good-bye oldfriend. No one will understand, that you were more than what they pereived you to be.

Thanks for all the fun times.

Bye.

Cut, crop and paste

2010-05-18T20:39:00.015+08:00

---this pain away.

Disclaimer: I do not own the pics, I just edit-ted (sp?) them.
Suspense:

Acknowledgement:

Need:

Avoid:

but 'till then;

answered questions.

2010-05-11T21:28:00.003+08:00

questions.

never-ending.

streaming through synapses, over and over again-

What?
How?
Where?
When?
Why?

Who?

and when you find the answers.

you find
not what you looked for
not what you yearned for.

but instead

something better.

you find

hope.

If a picture speaks a thosand words...

2010-04-25T20:09:00.016+08:00

So these should tell you a LOT.

Once upon a time, in a faraway land, where princesses and dragons went to bingo with eachother while princes would tap dance away with talking horses... there... was...

A boy with big great headphones who was determined to pave a new definition of tone-deaf singing. So, he went and barged into a room while singing a bieber lyriced song; thus diturbing the peace of the room.

Enraged by the abusive repetitive lyrics of 'baby, baby, baby, oooh baby', a small tiny boy rose up to the challenge;

the challenge to shut the big giant up. The lil' boy took a lethal weapon, an orange tipped object and pulled down a mask to shield his bleeding ears from the sharp sound coming from the throat of the ogre.

The masked crusade quickly runs to the towering fiend and sprouts words of an unheard language but it's intent was made clear:

'shut up, or I'll stuff this up your rectum'

or something like that.

But ALAS,

the towering ogre was too strong for the tiny soldier in an oversized helmet, instead, the small boy was pushed aside onto the awaiting arms, of a mop headed bespectacled girl,

There in her arms, the warrior found a way to rejuvenate himself, the young brave warrior decided to...

Pick his nose.

Disturbed by the provoking excavation of the warrior's mucus site, the civilian shakes her head and pushes the 'warrior' into the ogre's path. Where the ogre lifts the tiny fighter and dunks him into a basket;

and then hoists the basket and the body within, loftily above the ground. Both the captured and capturer shares a hearty laugh.

and they proceeded to 'battle' it out.

After setting the lil' warrior back to the ground, the giant and warrior went into a dangerous gut wrenching wrestling match. It was all laughter and smirks...

until some one was kicked in the crotch. *coughHazeeqcough*

there everything went:

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

The wait

2010-04-18T12:20:00.008+08:00

`It's 4.30

Drip. Drip. Your sweat plastered onto your back.

You're sitting there under the scorching sun, waiting.

Waiting for that accursed bus to appear at the bend.

Tick.Tock. the clock's ticking away on your wrist.

It's 4.32 now,

shouldn't the bus be here by now?

Your mouth turns dry, as you brain begins

to race.
What if the bus had broken down?
What if the bus was still in a traffic jam due to somesort of traffic collison?
Oh My God.
What if the bus had been in THE traffic collison?

Your heart paces faster, and worry etches itself onto your forehead.

It's 4.36

GOD! The woman said the bus would be by 4.30!
She said, 4.30

What is she playing at? Where is she? Who does she think she is?

You feel an irrational anger boil under the heat.

Where is she? Where is that woman?

You are never allowing this ever again. NEVER again.

STOP.

there it is!
The bus, it's FINALLY rounding the corner.

You see little heads near the window, as the bus crawls to you.

You search for that familiar face among the squashed features promptly pressed to the window.

You squint for the features imprinted to your brain in between waving arms.

You can't see it. You can't see him.

You frown at the thought of his younger form squashed between the much more older bodies in the bus.

Wait.
Oh god, what if he's not on the bus?
what if he got left behind?
what if...

and you stop. as you see a small figure sitting quietly in the bus.

Head down, shoulder slumped and a contemplative twist of the head; the relief you feel is tinged with the sadness that will never leave.

The head turns, and you see the ears rise from its droopy state as a limb stretch out and remove each digit and press itself to the frosty glass.

A smile.
A wave.

You happily reciprocate.

You watch as the figure bombards itself from the bus at the earliest chance.
You grin as it canons itself under outstretched arms of others, and jump into your awaiting arms.
You laugh as he hugs you and starts gabbing in a language you must've once known, but had forgotten.

'How was your class trip?'

The child smiles.

'Was it fun?'

The child nods.

"You wanna go again?"

He smiles and nods.

You sigh, and laugh at yourself. You know you'll feel torn, worried and insane about this again.

but you couldn't say no to that lil' boy;

your exception.

Rating for My Name Is Khan

2010-04-16T18:03:00.001+08:00

I rate it a nice 8.5/10

Watch it?

A must.

Movie Review : Clash Of The Titans

2010-04-11T13:27:00.007+08:00

Today I watched:

Overall, I must say... I was satisfied.

Though, many have said it was a 'rip-off' of Percy Jackson, Percius should be Hercules and the titans should be from the elements, I'll point out some minor details to you, right now.

One. Zeus had A LOT of children, and he didn't practice our 'one to one' monogomous function that we practice 'all the time'. geddit?

Two. I'd actually say Percy Jackson is the one ripping off Clash of the Titans cause this is just a REMAKE of an old movie made in the 1980's. GOT IT?

Three. The titans were not of elemental power. Titans do not represent 'big' 'scary' 'monsters'. TITANS ARE actually the ELDER GODS in Greek mythology, i.e. Zeus, Hades, Poseidon... yadda yadda yadda.

Anyways, critics aside... True the graphics were below of expected but hey, I think this movie is an overall above-average interesting film, that should not be over-shadowed by close-minded people who has watched too much of Disney movies *coughHerculescough* and do NOT know what they're talking about at all.

I say it's a good joy for all those Greek Mythology admirers out there! Especially those who always wandered how Medusa's lair would look like and also... the Kraken is AWESOME.

P.S. I know the Kraken isn't actually derived from Greek Mythology but.. puh-lease... it was sooo fun to watch it tear up the city. HAHA! :)

STARS: 4 Stars.

Wrong Choice.

2010-03-21T22:32:00.004+08:00

You feel the heat radiating from the orange orb in your hand.

Sweat embedded onto your forehead, and splattering your thick hair onto the base of your neck, preventing heat waves from escaping your already hot-head.

You wonder why did you chop your hair to a bob; it was so hard to tie now. Wait! Stop! You have to focus.

You shake your head to throw the pesky thoughs aside, as you urge faster; under an outstretched arm, past the bulldozing bodies and even faking a few directions to muddle the competition.

The competition; huge bulks of tower-power as they stomp across the court, forcing their face at you and greedy fingers grab at the grasped object in your hand.

There, you see it a hole in the defence!

Run, Run Qeel. Run. You've gotta make it.

NO! Blocked! Darn it.

You swerve and at the edge of your eyes, you see her.

She's running and not looking, just running around with her arms wide open. You have only 2-3 seconds to think about it. She can't be that bad. She must've caught something during all those countless trainings. On the other hand.. this was an important mission. It could determine success or failure for what you've all done; for what you've done.

You decide to give it a chance.

So you do it, you thrust the powerful orb into the air; hurling it to her all the while praying she would catch it.

In the split second the object leaves you, you feel a sudden coldness in you as you see her shocked expression and her despair of being trusted with such responsibilities. Overwhelming frustration guts you in the stomach as you see her flailing arms miss the orb as it passes past her outstretched limbs.

and is picked up by the opponent. You don't bother running to salvage the wreck that had happened; the wreck that you had caused.

Time's up.
Game's over.

You lost.

Ole!

2010-02-28T09:34:00.002+08:00

Yesterday was interesting, to say the least.

Woke up, tied up a few knots of work, did my early-morning jog, sat down outside and enjoyed nature while it was still cool outside.

Then came the rush, you see... yesterday was the perarakan on Maulud Nabi. Yes mates, even though Maulud Nabi was on Friday, the march was on Saturday.. due to Friday prayer.

Equation:

Maulud March+Friday prayer= Major TRAFFIC JAM

Hmm.. Jam.. I'm hungry.

Anyways, after all the marching and all that. I was dragged all over the Brunei District by my cousins. HAHA not really. But still.

We went from lounging it up in Empire; watching a movie:i.e. Percy Jackson&the Olympians and The Lightning Thief.

Gotta say though, Luke was cute.

Percy Jackson.. looked short. and too much like Zac Efron. "(=. Half expected him to start singing 'A whole new world' when he was fighting with Luke.

After that, we all (-KaDilah&AbgAsh) went to pantai Tungku where we Literally walked on shaky grounds. HAHA after watching this major showdown by this LOUD couple, we all pretended to surf and jumped on the already unstable rocks. :) Death wish, anyone?

Not really. :P

Then, ATV racing was on. WEEHEE. Felt good, feeling the wind in my air, the rumble of the engine.. and of course.. my cousin clutching to me for dear life while SWEARING I was a maniac.
Heh. Can't help it. Well, yea that's not technically true. But she CHALLENGED me. She was like 'Bah kalahkan Hazeeq ah!' and of course I did. I went all out on the gas pedal, swerved at the curves and made the ATV vehicle soar more than 2 times.

A maniac on the road? MAJOR understatement.

:)

Then it was Caroline's big shindig.
AND DO I MEAN.. BIG
"(=.

I swear to you, the moment I got dropped off and entered the house, I felt overwhelmed by the sheer force of numbers, until I saw a lil' group of friends and hanged around them until I had to go home.

Overall the party was entertaining and fun. :) Total laughter fest. Maybe it's my fault.. but you know what? I spent most of the night sweating. "(=.

Though I don't ROLL that way... I've gotta say:

Major Plus to the party, I got to see a pretty girl in a floral dress. AHAHAH

TEEHEE!

Thanks. For..well. having me. watching over me. though i find it weird. But. hahahah Okay. just thanks.

2010-02-06T14:14:00.004+08:00

I expected stampeding horses of anxiety, earth-shattering dissapointment and ofcourse the self-degrading sense of failure.

You know...The works. What am I saying? Ofcourse you know, welll... okay maybe you don't know.but I.. hmmm.. okay.. I'm losing myself here.

But you know what?

I did pretty alright. Could've done better, perhaps. but. I don't know why. I'm just content.

And nothing's gonna stop this feeling of;-

contentment.

Oh Brother.

2010-01-13T18:42:00.003+08:00

On the off chance of sounding like a mother...

Today was Haqeeme's THIRD day of school, and I am ready to report that he hasn't shed a tear at all. :) :D

Though, when he gets home he makes it a habit of knocking out on the couch. "(=.

Heh.

The real shock for me though... must have been the empty sounding house when he was gone through out the whole afternoon.

Doing my homework, with music blaring in the background during the afternoon without an interruption felt forgein to me. Like seriously, I half expected the door to open by itself and reveal this pompous lil' boy who just drags you away from work for a down time watching Power Rangers. Or even sit in your lap and scribble on your homewok while using your headphone to listen to the most classical musics, that you've just got to roll your eyes and tease him even if he can't retort back.

Weh. Look at me, looking back at the dear times when my brother would just shove open my bedroom door and bombard himself around like it was his own room.

"(=.=) No chance of that happening now, he's totally pooped out. Beyond pooped out. You can actually hear him snore and even see a frown pop out on his face in the middle of his slumber.

Makes you wonder what really happens in those Pre-K classes, heh?

You know... to make the most hyperactive boy I've ever met to fall asleep as soon as his head meets a soft landing?

Not that I'm complaining... I mean who would miss that absurdly stubborn ricochet of energy who wears you out by asking for dozens of piggy back rides and tons of jumping up and down while listening to his favourite music?

Err. Yea.

With that awkward thought, I gotta end this post.

Work calls for me. And I really need to shower :)

Hypocrite.

2010-01-08T21:27:00.004+08:00

Well.. heylow blog of mine.

It's been a while hasn't it? Heh. Been busy, I guess. Anyhow...

Today, while I was out and about around Brunei, I saw something. I saw a family, sitting down around this table but they were all to busy with their technology gizmos to even bother talking or even eating the cold food in front of each of them.

To say the least, it re-emphasised my belief that people these days probably don't really value 'family' much. I mean, even I'm guilty of that. I don't go jumping in joy and converse a lot with my household people... but I should. I really should. I spend a lot of my time around work and school, that I don't really see the point of trying to converse with my family, cause I'm so darn tired.

But you know what the funny thing is...

I know I'd die for them in a heartbeat, but I'd rather stick my head into a book then actually ask them how was their day.

It still astounds me that I can still be shocked at the notion that I can be such a hypocrite at times.

To the point of disgust.

Guess.

2010-01-01T14:38:00.004+08:00

Guess where I'm at.

Go on, guess where my over-bearing fantasy deluded mom brought us for New Year's celebration.

It's not that hard, just unbelievable. Honestly, I had no idea she even had a saving. I always knew she wanted some quality 'family' time. Yea. But here? I thought she was joking. Like seriously? HAHA Though I'm not complaining; it's not my money.

Soo... guessed where I'm at?

Here's a clue: it's an overpriced hotel.
Here's another clue: It has it's own cinema.
Okay the last clue:
Yup. I'm at THE empire. Right now. HAHA I'm in the lobby of the North Lagoon. No, seriously. and no, I'm not sharing my rooms with a dozen cousins. It's just me, my bro, my maid and Qeeme. One room, two nights, three days. Awesome. :)

Though it's kinda lousy that I have to go all the way down to the lobby just to get internet reception, the bed makes it all better. LIKE SERIOUSLY. My gosh. It totally envelopes you, and I swear it makes the most sore-est (is that even a word? HAHA) of backs feel better.

Wow. Look at me, gushing over a bed. :x

And don't let me get started on the food! Heh. All I can say is thank god, there was a package deal, at a good price lagi tu~~!

Anyways, this morning I woke up early. Is 4.30 early enough for you? Heh.

I watched the first sunrise of this year, and I felt... for the lack of adjectives.. I felt... awed.

Looking at the bright yellow orb of light begin to ascend to the heavens, a cold chilling wave of acknowledgment hit me. That thing was bigger than me, huge and more important than me. I mean, the sun gives us heat, light, even provides food for us. and what have I done?

Then it hit me, you know.

I felt... grateful.

How awesome is that? Way awesome. :)

Grateful for what? For everything. Cause If I wasn't such a stubborn child I wouldn't have stuck to E. Lit. If I wasn't such a proud figure, I'd have of course changed my subject choice ine form 4. If I wasn't so darn curious, then I'd never had figured out the answer I was looking for. If I was so open and more touchy feel-y, then I'd never had learned how to be.

Guess what I'm saying is...

I'm giving my cheers to 2009. It's been a real dash of fun, with it's rollercoaster rides of ups and downs. Of turmoils and bouncers. I'll never forget what happened. What was and what has.

and to 2010?

Bring it on.

New Layout.

2009-12-29T18:52:00.003+08:00

New year's coming closer, so why not change the Blog Layout for sore eyes, eh? HAHAHA

So. well. Changed the layout. OBVIOUSLY.

I've also made changes to my playlist, cause my taste has changed too.

I'm also gonna be giving this blog more of a visual sense to it, soon.
Just wait and You'll see. ;)

Been thinking of making this blog private, but then I have readers who don't have a blogger account.. so MAYBE. Don't go rioting on my c-box. *glares at the mentioned*

Kalau terasa jgn marah ye? hehehe

Yes, I speak Malay and I still prefer English. But maybe I'll post a few posts in BM, just for fun.

Heh. guess my blog's gonna be a lil' different.
It's gonna change.

Guess I've changed too.

Movie Review on AVATAR 2009

2009-12-21T12:32:00.005+08:00

Okay, last night I watched AVATAR.

I'm giving it 3/5 stars for performance, but 5/5 stars for visual effects.

Yes, the Storyline kinda rminds me of Disney's Pocahontas and I kinda feel the dialogue needed working on.

But.

Pandora's forests, the lighting, the skys, the eyowa tree.. were... Wow. And don't get me started on the creatures; the insanely awesome animals.... they were just soo.. Gosh. I can't even find the words to say what I think of them except.. they wow-ed me.

So Verdict? Worth the $8 ticket, just to see the graphics.

Heh. :)

Nothing to say soo..I'll ramble.

2009-12-16T19:13:00.005+08:00

I apologize for the long absent period, where I haven't updated much. Well, the reason is..

The reason is...

I don't know.

Like seriously.

I have no idea what to write anymore. It's like, I have nothing to say.

Everytime I think of something to say, the blank page just stares at me and I mirror it; I blank out. So I turn to my dvd collection and downloaded episodes of Gossip Girl.

So, I've been getting myself acquainted with Gossip Girl. It's a good series, a bit on the edge, but still good. To say I've got my hooked, would be a bit... of... an understatement. :P

Picture this, Qeelah wearing HEADPHONES that make her look like a doppelganger of Mickey Mouse staring at the computer screen: totally absorbed by the video she's watching. Now think of her actually laughing her ass off, slapping her thighs and on the verge of rolling on the floor all the while receiving wierded out looks by her brothers. Next you should try to imagine her talking to the characters on the screen, shouting to the people acting in the video and even sniffing at the sweet scenes.

Yes, that's how far I've been during the holidays. Everytime I have break or have to rest, I crack open my Gossip Girl Collection. I mean, what's not to like about the series?

Well, other than the explicit scenes (which aren't so explicit you know? Cause I've seen SKINS which is a British Tv Show; WAY MORE STUFF going on, if you catch my drift), Gossip Girl has a good cast, very amusingly dramatic yet twisted storylines, REALLY good actors and a very nice script that's laced by wit and is at times... dare I say it...filled with good vocab. There I said it. My english side has taken me in and over.

Heh. At least next time, if they pass out the reading pamphlet, I'll write the source as Gossip Girl. I don't care. It's the truth. Like seriously, when was the last time a Tv Show used the word 'incarcerated'? In the right context too.

Anyways, I should wrap this up. I'm currently on my 'break time' where I should be resting my weary muscles, but what the heck? why not play around with the thoughts in my head? HAHAHA

you know I'm kidding when I type this but...

xoxo

anak ketinggalan bas.

----------------------------------------
SAY WHAT?? HAHAHHAHAH SORRY COULDN'T RESIST.

too much Gossip Girl. :x I know.

Twittle dum, Twittle dee. After a cup of coke, here my say.

2009-11-27T23:09:00.003+08:00

Yea, I just drank coke. And yes, It feels good.

ANYHOW.

These past few days have been very eventful. Lots of things sprouting and exploding right and left. It's been a while since I've talked to my blog, so here goes:

.........

I have no idea what to say.
Like seriously.

My life carries on?

Heh. No. Too emo for a post.

Speaking of which I should really post up my stories.

Hmm.. Nah. Malas ku ingau. hahaha

Heh.

OH.

Tomorrow's Hari Raya Aidiladha.

To be honest, I don't really care what kind of raya it is, it's still Hari Raya and that means food. Real good food. Like.. Ayam Kurma, Nasi Kebuli, Kambing, Ketupat, Satay, Kuah Satay, Kelupis, and oh yea. AYAM KURMA.

Heh.

Gosh. Here comes the chicken. HAHA like seriously. It's being cooked while I type. Hmm. smells gooooooooooooooodd.. Can't wait to eat it. Hmm..

Can you imagine the taste of the ripe meat, as the soothing liquid roll around your tongue, languidly massage the inside of your mouth? Can you actually smell the teasing waft enter your nostrils playing around with your mind?

Well, I do. Can't wait to eat it.

Heh. Another reason to live.

A midnight rendezvous with rain.

2009-11-22T01:00:00.003+08:00

It's raining.

The chill wind seems to surround you and the trees right next to you seem to whisper and ruffle with movement. The silence of the street reaches your ear, and it echoes.You're worried for a moment, just a moment; you shrug it off.

It always happen anyways.

The drizzle continues.

You smile as you feel the pitter patter of droplets on the hood of your jacket. You've always had a soft spot for rain. Rain had always been, a comfort of sorts to you. You feel a twitch in your memorial lobe as you hear someone's voice said in a whisper of memory stating that most of your writing involved and evolved from the tiny water droplets falling from above.

You make a wiry smile. You've been in a middle of nostalgia and melancholy for a long time now, torn about all that was happening. Everything was spiralling, like a merry go round except faster than the it's speedlimit.

The rain's falling more insistently now, yet you remain at the same pace. For now.

You stare at your shoes, your poor poor shoes; you really should contemplate on buying new ones. Most of your stuff were worn out these days. Your forehead wrinkles as you ponder on the possibility that your constant walking on roads instead of pavements had contributed to that. Of course, you couldn't have done anything differently; darn country didn't have much pavement at all.

You grin as a memory washes through you, just like the rain was.

There!

You feel it.

Right then and there, you feel inspiration. The old companion that had long forsaken you for a small vacation has finally returned and you embrace them, you embrace them and you feel a little more alive than you've felt for a while, a little less useless. You can practically hear the verbs to describe the moment, the momentum to write a new spin off to one of your hanging stories that remain on a hard drive; never read by others except for your weary eyes.

You can feel your pace picking up as your brain's more lingual side shifted into gear. You need to type this out, and soon.

Perhaps you'll un-ignore that responsibility of owning a blog, and actually update a story or something. Tonight. It has to be...

Well, it's past midnight, you think, so you re-iterate back your words.

Withink 2 hours, your blog, your forsaken blog will breathe back into the web with an update.

2 hours.

You smirk as you finally, reach your destination; home. You rush in, barely able to enter the key; so eager were you to concoct something, anything.

It's been a while.

But woes you, as you sit infront of the white screen your mind can't make up what to write. You shake your head in disdain and dissapointment.

You look out the window : it's raining.

You smile.

You type the first few words into the empty box:

It's raining.

The Deception of Truth Chapter 7

2009-10-01T17:11:00.001+08:00

Disclaimer: I'm so tired of typing this out but here goes: My story, My chracters, My plot. No taking. Capiche?

Chapter 7

Laughter rang through the kitchen, following the statement.

“Fine… I just need to find the pasta…” Bobby said while smiling at the blatant catch-phrase of her friend.

Sherry pointed out, at the urging of her impatient growling stomach, the obvious:

“You know, we could just order take out.”

Bobby could practically feel a sweat drop perspire against her forehead and mentally thwacked herself.

Smirking at her comrades, Sherry Lynn took out her cellular phone that was always in her pocket, and coursed through her contact list while reading the ption aloud.

“So… Italian? Japanese? Chinese? Mexican?”

“Italian.” Said the synchronized voices of Kaylee and Bobby, both already salivating at the thought of lasagna and spaghetti.

“Should we ask Prudence too?” Sherry asked, a concerned tone heard between her words and spaces.

Both Kaylee and Bobby ignored the question.

Sherry understood the unspoken decision and knew she couldn’t do anything to change her friend’s choice. Sighing to herself, she dialed the restaurant and ordered a rather large dinner, consisting of spaghetti, pasta and lasagna.

“Speaking of the she-devil, where is she?” Kaylee pounced on Bobby as Sherry patiently repeated the order to the nasal teen on the other line, who sounded like he couldn’t give a yarn’s darn on her order.

Meanwhile…

Leaves of rich colour fell from heaven, as a strong fist of wind pummeled into a red shadow. The leaves pinned themselves against the figure and soil from soft sand wafted the surrounding, creating a mist around the silhouette.

High-heels worn by the figure, echoed on the pavement, making ants and worms under it squeal in fear of being stomped by the pressure exerted over such a small area.

The shadow, briskly strutted into the dark night, with her hand to her ear; pressing a cellular object to her ear canal. A muffled voice could be heard from the phone, but not identified. It’s distinct masculine pitch could be heard, of a baritone note, and also in the stern grunts that answered.

In return, the shadow released sound waves of it’s own into the mouth piece of the object. Shimmering light from the street light danced upon the surface of the curve where it settled in. A sharp nose above and carefully curled eyelashes adorned the small face, and startling green pierced the jaded face.

From a glance, it would seem a normal picture: a teenage girl receiving a call with a very eager voice, hanging on each word from the other end as if her whole world demanded on it.

Watching Prudence Bliche snap her phone shut at the abrupt dismissal by the caller, no one would’ve guessed the truth:

It did.

Happy Birthday...

2009-09-30T00:45:00.003+08:00

Ayah.

Yeah. I haven't updated for a while. A long while. I have no good reason why I haven't. Just because.

@!@!@!@!@!@!

It was a hot Monday night, hiding under the table with her small unknown sketch pad, she feels like she's in a heater. The heat's getting to her as she tries to draw a potrait of a person; making each mistake exagerated and soon she's nearly torn her sketch pad into half with frustration.

Cluttered attempts surround her and soon she's ready to explode; she's never been well known for her patience with herself. Crawling out of her hiding place, that she really is getting to long for, she's muttering to herself about the idiocy of her hand.

She's in the living room. Alone.

She knows she should go to the Tv room where the rest of her immediate family was; loitering and talking. Yet she felt a need to be alone.

So she remained.

She decides to sit on the long couch, relaxing her muscles after a tiring day at school. She hears loud voices, ringing pass through the thin glass sliding door seperating her from her family. Just like anyother day in her grandmother's house it's rowdy, noisy and nearly impossible for peace and quiet, something she craved.

Hours pass by and she gets thirsty. Dragging her legs to the kitchen to get a glass of water, she passes a scene that happened every other time. Seeing him sitting there, with a cigarette dangling between his fingers, she marches off to him and sits by sipping in the plain water.

The water trickles down her gullet as smoke travels his trachea.

Scathingly, she says smoking is bad for health. That it could lead to death.

He nods knowingly and takes a puff anyway while rubbing his stubble.

Frustrated by being ignored for what felt the hundredth time, she frowns and is ready to get up. It's always like this.He smokes, she reprimands, he shrugs it off. Always been, always is, always will.

Until he spoke.

He says the three words that she seldom hears, and though they were short and gruff, they were a shock. She's shaken and eyeing him wierdly, and instead of answering back she just nods and walks away.

"I love you."

She'd never know, she'd come to regret that for the rest of her life.

The next thing she knows it's thursday night, she's in a speeding vehicle and she doesn't care.
The next thing she knows she's clutching her cousin to stop him from screaming.
The next thing she knows she's desperately pulling on her mask.
The next thing she knows she's holding in tears.
The next thing she knows her heart's broken.

But most of all
The next thing she knows, she regrets not saying "I love you" back to her uncle.

Malay Orals.

2009-09-01T16:59:00.006+08:00

Entering through the automatic sliding door, cold air tighlty grips your lungs.

It claws your insides out; feeding the dreadful monster you just had locked in. The monster awakens and it purrs in contempt as you make your way to the designated seating area. It crawls inside your abdomen demanding your attention and distracting you from reading the given text.

You know you should ignore it, or perhaps lock it in further.

You're now grasping the yellow card tightly.

You doubt it really shows, but the monster is now on the loose. Inside you, the monster snarls and prowls through your veins; pushing your heart, your poor tired heart, to press itself further outwards into the cage of your ribs.

You've read the text twice and in that time given you know you could've read more, if only that monster had remained in its slumber. If only you had enough sense or courage to lock the monster in a more stronger prison; an impenetrable fortress in the middle of a maze filled with dangerous conquests where not only the chance of entrance was abysmal but the chance of escape was impossible.

If only.

You hear a shuffle, and you know it's your turn soon. So soon.

It's too soon.

Your overworked heart is on overdrive as the monster places a single long-nailed finger onto on of your arteries; you fear that the arteries would cut open and you, you would slowly bleed to death.

Panic!

You could practically see red lights flashing and a siren blaring through the usually quiet abode as you place your bum squarely onto the chair.

Eyes searching for a distraction from the monster's whining, you re-read the rules and regulations pasted right infront of you. After nearly memorising them you can't help, but roll you eyes. Nobody was stupid to do that in a public place.

No one ; everybody knew the consequences. Even you did.

Thinking on the subject, another's words fill your ears.

"Relax. You'll do fine."

You can't help it; you scoff. It was easy for her to say that, she already went through it. She was probably at home. You were here. You were the finale, the person who'll suffer for being the last as they who were to judge would've heard so many answers similar to the ones your primitive mind will feebly concoct.

Diverting yourself from the troublesome thoughts that so easily plagued your now fragile mind, you hear the footsteps of one that you've known for a while. Looking up, you ask with you widen your eyes and your eyebrows rise above the status quo.

She squeezed her brown eyes, the big brown eyes that you (unfortunately) had a soft spot for, in a disgruntled way, but you see a glimmer of joy dancing in her irises and a pulsating pupil that was practically grinning.

"All the best."

Her words linger, as you yourself go to where she had been just moments ago.

Your heart is practically in your throat; you fear that you might haemorrhage right infront of the two women.

One.

They're still talking. About food.

Two. Three.

Rumble.

Four.

That was your stomach being squeezed by the monster.

Five.

You think your heat just might stop from exhaustion.

Six.

You take a seat.

You hear the woman on your left speak in a language that even after all these years of studying it, even if it was your supposedly 'mother language', you find alien.

In a split second, just like a flash, you hear what was said just an hour ago; as if you were watching a movie.

Smiling, you take a deep breath and read the text.

With each word,the monster slowly dissipates; curling into itself.

With each word, you find yourself drawing in something you didn't know you had.

With each word, you grow more confident; answering with more ease than you had thought possible.

With each word, you thank god, for the fact that you had actually listened to her.

At the end of the day, Malay orals had been better than you had dare thought.

A long marathon....

2009-07-31T14:33:00.003+08:00

of movies!

Imagine this, it's you and your siblings lying on the couch, drinks in hand, and the lights are off. The speakers right next to you, and KAPOOWWW..

Gotta say this,

Transformers 2 was awesome.

It was funny, and gut wrenchingly AWESOME.

Which reminds me, I need to lend my dvd to Sherly. A.S.A.P.

The horror of waiting to watch that movie while suffering through your mocks, I tell you!!

Anyhow, what's next on my list of must watch movies?

G.I. JOE : RISE OF THE COBRA.

Can I hear a 'what, what?'

You dunno what it is? What G.I. Joe is?

Well then, you my friend, have lived a very content ignorant life without the likes of male figures obsessing about old folk-lore, the military nature of life, and of course the gory interception between the love for one's country and bombing an opposing nation.

Or in other words, you didn't have a father like mine.

True, I have like, 7 men who I call dad, but what the heck, right?

They all are important to me.

Anyhow back to the point, what is G.I. Joe?

Well, G.I. Joe was actually an action figure, that turned into comics, then tv. cartoons and eventually movies.

Yes, it is an action-packed movie, and probably will include a lot of technology crap in it.
But hey, that's my type of movie.

and oh.. yea.

I'm having a wee bit of a writer's block on my story.' the deception of truth'.

so.. suggestions?

The Deception of Truth Chapter 6

2009-07-29T00:43:00.000+08:00

Chapter 6

The occupants of the kitchen all jumped to their feet, immediately taking defensive stances; a reflex they had gained after 6 years of training.

“What are you doing here?” snarled Kaylee at the new-comer, who was in the middle of the kitchen archway, smugly standing superior-like, Kaylee’s feet still in place, strategically ready to kick the chair towards the intruder.

“I guess, you didn’t read the cards properly. It did say I would come today.” Replied the stranger, as she flipped her hair and stared at the three girls of still in their defensive stances; ready to strike.

Sherry Lynn nearest to the new-comer had her fist raised as if in a sparring match, ready to strike her opponent down with her well known knock out knuckle uppercut. Bobby on the other hand, had grasped the nearest objects near her, wielding the spatula and knife expertly, already in place and aiming to the stranger who had intruded their home in less than two seconds.

Nobody moved.

Onyx eyes glared at the high-heeled dwarf stalked her way into the kitchen, settling into a chair uninvitingly. Kaylee Crawford felt like a bull, ready to pierce her horns into the re-jacket the woman wore.

As if sensing the hostility in the air, Sherry Lynn came to the rescue.

“So, Prudence care to take a seat?”

Sherry Lynn mentally slapped her head. Prudence smugly smirked at her from her seat, and spoke.

“You may seat down, if you please,”

At this Sherry Lynn tightly smiled at the guest, and sat her bottom onto the wooden chair gracefully. She then signaled to Kaylee to sit down, but Kaylee ignored her.

“I’d like some earl tea.”

:Prudence Bliche ordered to Bobby, who was staring at her with an intense warmth that could not be mistaken for welcome. Gladly, Bobby turned her back from the table, and made a show of looking for the teapot.

“I’ll help you.”

Kaylee offered her friend; seeing an opportunity to do something with her hands other than fighting the urge to strangle. Sending an apologetic look to Sherry Lynn, who was looking a bit hurt by Kaylee’s abandonment, Kaylee bustled off to the far-side of the kitchen where she could keep herself (and her temper) in check.

After finding the hiding teapot and setting the appropriate ware for high-tea, Bobby made a show of looking for biscuits for them to gnaw on while Kaylee waited for the hot water to simmer enough to be poured.

“ Wanna put in some vinegar into her tea?” whispered Bobby into Kaylee’s ear, making Kaylee guffaw and spill hot water over her hand.

Stiffling a whimper, Kaylee felt an ever-growing urge to annihilate the source of a voice that chose that exact moment to make it’s present heard.

“I see, Crawford’s still an incompetent klutz.”

Biting down a vulgar retort, Kaylee immediately went to the sink to run cool water on her hand and her anger. The water from the tap softly massaged away, the stinging feel puncturing her skin, and Kaylee regretfully tooke her hand away from the comforting sink to take her place at the table, thankfully the furthest from Prudence Biche.

There, the usually loud trio sat in silence staring at their cups, as Prudence sipped her tea. The silence was the least not comforting, and the tension in the air could be cut swiftly by the bluntest spoon.

“Uhm, we hope you enjoy your stay.” Offered Sherry, trying to reduce the friction of air particles with a splash of hospitality.

Prudence opted to ignore the statement and made the gesture of cleaning her black skirt. Seeing this made both Kaylee and Bobby seeth in anger.

“Speaking of which, how long do we have to endure your-“ Kaylee jumped in, sweetly covering her words with a mocking tone whilst a smirk hooked it’s way through her face, before ending the question.

Sherry Lynn warily looked at Kaylee reproachfully.

“-graceful companionship? ”

“For as long as I deem it probable for me to clean out a few loose ends and rectify the wrongs in this team.”

was the smug reply, from the precocious teenage intruder.

“Like your suitcases strewn all over our living room?” quipped Bobby, after had catching a glance at their living room, that was now filled with at least five or six bulks of suitcases.

“Bobby! Kaylee! ” Sherry Lynn’s voice reproached them with just their names; she didn’t want them to push their luck.

“ Bobby? Bobby? That’s what you call yourself by, Barbara? Bobby?” mockingly the voice of Prudence rang through the kitchen. “Isn’t that… very masculine of you. Finally coming out of the closet, Barbara Olga Barnaby?”

This hit a nerve.

Bobby visibly flinched at the sound of her full name, and glared at Prudence with such intense heat that if looks could kill, Prudence would’ve been nothing but a low pile of dirt.

‘ as she should be’ thought Bobby savagely, dreaming of the vision where Prudence were to be vaporized by lasers and bombed by several missiles.

Bobby Barnaby despised people bringing out old taunts, alluding to her past.

Anger boiled it’s way through Bobby’s bones, and adrenaline pumped in her veins, she was THIS close to throwing out the unwanted intruder out to the streets.

But before Bobby could unleash her fury, Prudence ever so gracefully slinked out of the kitchen, with the phone to her ear signifying she had a phone call to make, leaving the trio at peace.

Kaylee and Sherry Lynn, glanced warily at each other as they could practically see Bobby shake with anger and frustration, ready to pounce on anyone who said the wrong thing. After a grueling few seconds, Sherry Lynn decided to break the tensed ice.

“You know what? I’m still hungry.”

The Deception of Truth Chapter 5

2009-07-27T21:38:00.006+08:00

A/N: An excuse for me to practise my English writing skills for English 1 and English 2. :P

Claimer: This story, it's plot and characters are mine. My twisted brain, meshed reality with fantasy, alluded memoirs and dreams together to give me this, so please do not borrow or take or steal anything. If you do,may winged monkeys with rabies plague you for eternity.

And now, to get on with the story.

Chapter 5

Kaylee watched as Sherry Lynn, slowly, ever so slowly open the pocket. Her brown-haired friend then took out a card exactly the same that she was currently holding. Hazel eyes metamorphosed into a cold chilling colour, as she read the bold lines encrypted into the plastic card in her hand.

“We’re being invigilated?” asked Sherry Lynn, her hazel eyes flashing with an emotion that mirrored the inner turm oil in Kaylee's.

A startled cry pierced the air, followed by a clatter of pots and pans. A girl of 19 years of age stood at the other side of the room, spectacles magnifying the taken aback look in her dark coffee irises.

“We’re being invigilated?” echoed the be-spectacled girl.

“Apparently, yes.” answered Kaylee in a disdained dripped tone.

“Invigilated?” wide eyed with disbelief, Sherry Lynn jabbed at the card that she held.

Kaylee nodded her head sadly :

“I know, right?”

There the brunette across the room chose to ask eagerly trying to find what Kaylee and Sherry Lynn were talking about:

“Invigilated by who?”

“Read your file, will you?”

Exasperated Kaylee threw a blue file with a long label to the girl, again repeating instructions where to find the abominable card.
Bobby caught the file with ease and expertise, like catching a Frisbee, quickly fishing out a card similar to Kaylee’s and Sherry’s.

Reading the inscription on the card, Bobby’s eyes immediately widen to the extent of nearly popping out, while her mouth gaped unbelievingly; making her seem like a fish.

“No way. Of all people we get Puny Prudey ?”

Bobby practically screamed, still wide eyed. Not that Kaylee could blame her.

Prudence Bliche had an infamous reputation for being a very by-the-book agent ever produced by the company. Her inane compensation of being able to spot mistakes in reports and schedules of her fellow graduates during her academy years, training for the company, had caught the administrator’s eyes.

At first she had been training with the Technology Researcher’s Unit with Kaylee, but had been changed courses to a more suitable course, in the administration strategic station, or what Kaylee referred to ‘ the Donkey’s stable’. Prudence being Prudence, had chosen the course that would give her a sure amount of power over her peers; invigilating.

Being an invigilator, would mean that Prudence had to check on any teams she wanted, staying with them through out the course of a mission, to observe, note down and also determine the fate of the teams; giving her the authority to either suspend a whole team and send them through a grueling course, dedicated to re-boot an agent’s self worth and reputation.

For this reason alone, teams had long learned to despise the ever-coming inevitable visit of the dreaded invigilator.

That’s what Sherry Lynn felt. Dread and frustration curling up within her abdomen, Sherry did not want an invigilator to come and scrutinize the trio. A dash of anger, hit her squarely on the chest, as she came to realize something and voiced it out with an incredulous tone:

“Why do we need to be invigilated, anyhow?”

A voice that did not belong to either of the three girls sitting around the table, rang through the kitchen doorway, answering Sherry Lynn’s question promptly.

“ A question with such an obvious answer.”

The Deception of Truth. Chapter 3 and Chapter 4

2009-07-24T14:49:00.001+08:00

Chapter 3

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Bobby whipped her head to her right.

“Why’d you stop me from giving that old hoot a piece of my mind?” she said heatedly to her onyx eyed friend who was still staring at the floor.

Her friend looked at her, stared straight at her in the eye, smiled and said

“Because.”

“Right.”, replied Bobby to the simple answer, a very frustrated tone intertwined in between her words and letters.

The tense air, which always seemed to lead to an explosive argument between her two friends, felt suffocating to Sherry Lynn. Quickly searching for something to calm her hot-headed companions Sherry Lynn opened her mouth and said.

“I’m hungry.”

The reaction was instant.

It was as if ice water had been splayed over her two friends and both of them stared at her in disbelief for a moment,(and you could nearly see the sweat drop on their heads) then at each other, before simultaneously answering the statement.

“When are you not?”

Forgetting the tense argument that had been budding, Bobby and Kaylee high-fived at the sight of their retort; making Sherry Lynn glare at them both.

“I’ll take that as my cue, hey do you guys know where the pasta is?” smirked Bobby as she wiped here hands from imaginary dust.

“How should we know? You’re the chef of the house.” stated Sherry Lynn, and it was true.

Out of the the three girls, Bobby was the one who cooked all the meals, excluding breakfast. It wasn’t like anyone forced her to, it was just that neither of her two housemates were what was called ‘kitchen-friendly’. In other words, Sherry Lynn couldn’t cook to save her life, while Kaylee was an accident just waiting to happen.

Receiving Sherry Lynn’s comment with a shrug, Bobby looked on to Kaylee who seemed to be in deep thought. After what seemed a few seconds, Kaylee finally looked up to Bobby and said in a confused tone:

“Dude, we have pasta?”

Both Sherry Lynn and Bobby wisely chose to ignore Kaylee’s question, and retreated into the kitchen; leaving their queer friend to ramble to herself about pasta.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And now, a rare treat. after the proddings of gman. (Majal kau 'wang!!!)

Chapter 4
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The kitchen was a quaint place, with a breakfast island and a small dining table for 6 people, it was a very comfortable dwelling. A humming refridgerator, was cornered by cupboards filled with various utensils. Of which they were rummaged through by Bobby Barnaby who was still searching in vain for the missing pasta.

Bobby shifted through boxes of food mixings and cereal, the cans of compressed food but still could not find her treasure.

“Why not just cook something else?” said a voice behind her, hungrily. Sherry Lynn had just spent five minutes staring at her friend’s search for the pasta and though she was amused by Bobby’s antics she was hungry, and a hungry Sherry Lynn was an irritable Sherry Lynn. She sat at the table, her fingers tapping the surface trying to distract herself from the gnawing feeling that was sinking in her stomach.

“’Cause Sherry I want to eat pasta.” Came Bobby’s gruff reply as she was bent over desperately looking for her craved food.

“ We should hire a detective.” Stated a smirking Kaylee Crawford who had just appeared near the archway, startling both of the kitchen’s dwellers with her sudden appearance..

“ Well, we are spies, aren’t we?” asked Bobby in retaliation.

“Yep.” chirped Kaylee, completely ignoring the sarcasm, joining Sherry at the table, with files in her hand.

Grumbling to herself about her cravings for pasta, Bobby returned back to her futile search for the ‘long stringy brittle run-aways’.

Kaylee flipped open one of the blue files she had brought, that had her name on it, scanning each line with her onyx eyes.

“Looks like our target’s a big shot “ observed Sherry who was peeping at Kaylee’s file.

“Read your own file!” snapped Kaylee.

“Oh, fine.”

Sherry sighed as she opened her dreary file.

‘Hmm… seems like a lot of research work… poor Kaylee.’ Thought Sherry as she glanced at the amount of paperwork and data presented, needed to be researched and exploited by the team.

‘No wonder she’s so tense.’ Sherry glanced at her team mate, and saw Kaylee pinch her nose hard as if getting a migraine just by reading the pages of assignment for her to do.

Sherry Lynn thanked god that she wasn’t a techie.

Each team from the ‘company’ (or so they called it) had to have atleast two infiltrators and minimum one technical advisor or for a shorter term a ‘techie’.
For Sherry’s team, the infiltrators were Sherry and Bobby whilst Kaylee was the team’s techie.

Infiltrators were the ones who ‘infiltrated’ the ‘enemy’s den’ by any possible way. Be it such through bribes, parties, or seduction, it was the infiltrators mission to get in and get out unscathed no matter the consequences. It was mandatory for them to master the art of disguise, martial arts and even the science of manipulating the psychological working of the human mind. For them to be able to do this, they needed a techie.

A techie worked ‘behind the curtains’. Techies were the ones recording the progress of the mission, marking each discovery and eventually sending in full reports of the mission back to the company. They provided the Infiltrators information from what they’ve researched on each character that was connected to the target and also the target itself, as the company did not dish out much information to their field teams. This was an extra precaution for the company, as if the team was caught, the company would have no connection to the fallen team.

“It’d be like we never existed.” Remarked Sherry dryly in her realm of thoughts, as she pondered what would happen if her team was caught.

“Unbeleivable!” penetrated a voice through Sherry’s mind.

Snapping back to the realm of reality, Sherry’s focus was attached to her brown-haired friend who was glaring a piece of card with a very intense look in her onyx eyes. Confused Sherry asked:

“What?”

“Look at the front pocket, in front. At the file cover.”

Sherry Lynn did as she was instructed.

A rant

2009-07-17T19:45:00.004+08:00

I haven't been paying attention to my blog for a while. And I do mean a while. Sue me.

I was really intending to update the story. I really was....

BUT

that was before I saw my Gourmet Points.

My writing mood totally evaporated into a vacuum, and I was cast into a thunderstorm of FRUSTRATION.

For three days, the stupid application had kept informing me it could NOT establish connection and even dared suggest for me to update my flash player.

For three days:

THREE DAYS.

Dude, seriously.

Three days, THREE DAYS.

And now because of that I've fallen far from my aim.

Staring at those tiny absurdly-clothed people made up of megabytes walk in and out of my lot meeting head on with my small army who were armed with pots and sore feet, I felt my eye twitch.

It could have been due my restless eyes glaring at the lit screen for to long without blinking,
but it's way more amusing to think it was because I felt very exasperated.

And I was exasperated, trust me I was.

I was so frustrated with the over-dramatically slow walking of my staff, the over-rated complaint of slow-service and even the wierd styled avatars driving over old, unreasonably shiny cars.

AND

Honestly, who sells carrots at the price of $3800? Who does?

Well, I'll tell you who. It's that wretched vege-hawker by the side of my restaurant that's who. She waves her darn vegs like flags, as if anyone would be interested in her grossly expensive 'fresh' ingredients.

Fresh, my butt.

You know what, Veg Waving Lady? I'm gonna buy from India. Yea, India. Way cheaper, and FRESH.

Not like you, you blood-sucking wretched urchin.

And don't even get me started with those petty creatures we call "customers".

They come and go as they please, demanding food at absurdly short instances, and paying all of the services and food with a measly $2.

Two dollars.

What kind of lousy payment is that? Your talking about bowls that are so big they fill the whole table and you're paying like two dollars. What about those poor waiters/ waitresses who have to carry those darn heavy food to you or even those tired chefs who bust their butts just giving you your darn 2 dollars worth? And also the worn knees of the cleaner(s) who has to clean the marks that you and your darn shoes bring to my clean abode of refreshments?

Not that I'm saying the employees in that restaurant is all that innocent.

Infact, they too are guilty of treason and ungratefulness.

You employees, work. I admit you do your work. Yet you do not do it with the vigor or appreciation that I myself had hoped for. Come on, I've (literally) fed you, I've even timed myself so you wouldn't need to suffer that prolonged torture of having your energy level drop lower than 50.

Every 15 minutes, and I reward you all a whole glass of water costing $60 each.

$60 x 8 =$480

That's like cyber-murder, seriously.

Over-priced goods, under-entusiastic workers and unbelievably slow-collecting gourmet points.

And yes, you've probably guessed by now that I've just spent about a few minutes worth of words into this blog about that wretched mind addicting game.

This world is coming to a short coming ends with those sad stingy impatient twerps and underpaid un-enthusiasts..

or maybe that's just me. :) (which is almost always the case when it's associated with me)

The Deception of Truth. Chapter 2

2009-07-04T22:10:00.002+08:00

Chapter 2

The small remote whirred and beeped like an ambulance having a fit, making sure the sound it emitted was heard through out the whole house: from the kitchen where Bobby was currently busy preparing for dinner to the bedrooms upstairs where they seldom resided.

Sherry and Kaylee simultaneously glanced at the ringing device; that rang with an insistent annoying beep, and then looked away. Both were preoccupied with the view of their familiar living room; pointedly ignoring the ringing remote

Kaylee sat and stared at the wall, which was adorned with several pictures of natural sites of beauty; her favourite was the beautiful picturesque of a forest the three friend had gone on an ‘assignment’. The picture was hauntingly beautiful in it’s black and white glory, with all the leaves swaying to a non-visible whispering wind, twigs laying about marking unknown territories and trees bent into an archway alluding the scene to seem like a corridor leading to hidden secrets or maybe an escape from reality.

Sherry Lynn simply snatched a magazine which had laid ontop of the messy coffee table in front of the couch and proceeded to ‘read’. After reading a page from the magazine, Sherry snorted with laughter.

‘Oh how misfortunate for those wealthy brats to have accidentally worn the same dress!’ thought Sherry Lynn with dry humour as she read the overdramatic reaction and reason for a catfight between two teen-stars.

“You guys gonna answer that?” called Bobby who was busy trying to find pasta in their kitchen. Silence met her question as both teens in the living room acted as if they couldn’t hear her which was impossible since the kitchen had an open archway leading towards the living room.

Sighing with frustration, Bobby abandoned her search and stalked to the living room; annoyed by the pollution of sound made by the wretched device.

Snatching the remote from the coffee table, where it laid inside a puddle of magazines, Bobby played with the thought of throwing the remote away but her conscience got through to her. She clicked the enter button on the remote while pointing it to the Television sitting opposite them all.

Immediately the Television came to life, showing a man who sat behind a forbidding looking desk with sitting primly faced with a stoic expression of a terse and ‘by-the-book’ air.

“Took you long enough to answer that machine.” stated the man, his tool bar moustache twitching slightly as a brisk voice escaped his frowning lips.

No one answered his statement.

Cold harsh eyes surveying the three girls and the living room from the glass of the TV set, stopped and focused on an object which laid innocently on top of the coffee table: Sherry Lynn’s file.

He stared hard at them all, from Kaylee who sat at the far right determinedly staring at the floor, to Bobby whose expression practically said ‘screw you’ and finally reaching Sherry Lynn staring blankly at the opposite wall.

“I see you’ve gotten your files, have you read them?” the man asked, his eyes getting smaller as his frown became more pronounced through the screen. Pixel after pixel delivering a very loud message of contempt.

“Obviously you haven’t, you silly girls wouldn’t have gone passed the first page.”
barked the voice, making the three girls either clench their fists or bite their tongue or for Bobby’s case raise a very arched eyebrow towards the man.

“Well, maybe your company shouldn’t have picked us ‘silly little girls’ for this work then.”

Bobby’s answer pierced the air, her eyes shining behind the shield of her spectacles, giving off an air of danger which was readily recognized by her two friend both at her side.

“I’d like to remind all of you, that as long as you are binded by the contract you had readily signed you will treat me with respect!” raised the man, anger again portrayed by the twitching of his moustache and pursed lips.

Bobby again opened her mouth to retort, but was silenced by the pinch and the slight shake of the head at her right side; Kaylee's side. An obvious plea for her to stop before things got out of hand. Looking away from the screen, Bobby opted for silence as the best defense.

The man took her silence as defeat.

“Now, the mission you are going to be handling is a case classified B Omega, you will handle this case with care. The objective is to capture, interrogate and eliminate.” he spoke decisively, cutting the air with the curtness of his words.

“We expect the information to be handed in the moment of duration given. I strongly suggest you to start reading that file before attempting this mission.” His eyes grew smaller, pronouncing the crow foot at the side of his face more than ever. Tensely he re-opened his mouth letting out the last words.

“Failure is not an option.”

And with that the Television set went blank.

The Deception of Truth. Chapter 1

2009-06-29T23:50:00.010+08:00

Dark eyes narrowed as it stared at the plastic card in front of them. Her mouth pursed into distaste as she glared at the fonts printed onto the card. Hands threatening to break the demeaning plastic into half.

‘Unbeleivable’, she thought vehemently. The young brunette did not move an inch, as the door flung open to reveal her friend of years.

“I have to dye my hair PINK?!’ her peer screamed, her pitch dislocating altitudes of sorts. Dark coffee eyes wide with shock and apprehension grew even wider as she waved the file in her hand as if it was on fire. Her spectacles shone by the reflected cones of light splayed by the ceiling lamp of the blue walled room.

A smirk played on the face of the onyx eyed girl while glancing at her franticing comrade, when… a shriek pierced the air.

Fear and panic reflected in both female’s faces as they sprinted out of the room and into the living room they all shared. There they saw the other resident of the residual home they all shared: she was screaming.

Both stared wide eyed at their brown haired colleague who was supposedly the most collected of their group. Stopping for breath the small petite girl finally turned and grinned at her housemates while dropping a file similar to their's ontop the coffee table.

“I get to get red highlights!!” she jumped and laughed on the couch as a child would when given sweets. An exasperated sigh escaped the watching duo.

‘Not again…’ they both thought as she jumped; nearly decapitating the couch, and whooped aloud.

“Sherry, get off the couch!” spoke the girl of onyx eyes, deeply disturbed at looking her nap spot being disrupted by the apparently enthusiastic hazel-eyed teen infront of her.

The red-haired wannabe abruptly stopped her celebration , and dismembering of the couch and blew a raspberry at her friend.

"Very mature Sherry, very mature" retorted the disturbed teen.

“Kaylee is such a Fun-spoiler”, teased Sherry cheerfully; mockingly.

“I am not!” jumped the words from Kaylee’s mouth; she never thought much before talking.

“Oh there they go again…” moaned their be-spectacled friend, who shook her head and went away from the fueled banter of her friends to the kitchen.

“ Kaylee is a FUN-SPOILER!!”

“Sheryy is a COUCH-JUMPER”

“That’s better than a FUN-SPOILER”

Kaylee gaped at her ‘opponent’ apparently at a loss of words.

“Bobby!!! Back me up here” Kaylee shouted into the kitchen.

Popping her head into the living room, the be-spectacled girl smirked at her onyx-eyed friend; making Kaylee regret asking her for help.

“Dude, you are a fun-spoiler” grinned Bobby, disappearing back through the kitchen doorway; leaving her onyx-eyed comrade to gape at her shadow.

'Great,they're ganging up on you,' thought Kaylee to herself as she dwelled on her idiocy of walking into said trap several times before.

“ See Kaylee… you’re a Fun-spoiler,” teased the now smirking other occupant of the room as she flopped back onto the couch.

“You better close that mouth of yours too..” Sherry continued, flippantly grabbing the remote to watch television.

“At least my name isn’t Sherry Lynn” Kaylee grumbled as she too flopped onto the couch.

Instantly the atmosphere of the room metamorphosed intensely. The temperature dropped into glacier-like degrees sending shivers up Kaylee’s spine.
Slowly Sherry turned her head, to glare at Kaylee and opened her mouth.

“What did you say?” Sherry sweetly spat out to her hyperventilating friend.

“Nothing, I said Nothing… You win! Yes.. That’s it.. You won.” muttered Kaylee quickly.

Sherry raised her eyebrow when… the TV remote rang.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A/N : Heh. *Waggles Eyebrow*
Got that from a dream. Haha :)
Yes, the Tv Remote rang. that isn't a typo. It really did ring.
:) the characters were based on a dream. but I'm tweaking the plot-line.

Anyhow.... what say you to a lil' help? Reviews, Comments.. and Critics?

2009-06-20T11:07:00.001+08:00

Dude.. haha long time no watch bahh. :)

"And the day is saved.. thanks to the power puff girls!"

A bit rusty with my writing skills. O.o

2009-06-12T14:22:00.002+08:00

At first I wanted to copy Hardy's style of writing, but it's way to mind bogglig for me to endeavour for just two hours. soo yeaa still working on it. :) anyhow. so, yea. okay.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The moon peeked through soft fluffy clouds, winking to her admirers, sending messages of sweet lullabies through sensous rays splaying upon the courtyard. The sky was adorned by the soft twinkling of light, shone by the luminous stars, perceiving a sense of beauty enamouring the hearts of several below. The wind slowly whispered sweet nothings into ears, canaling through a lulling feeling of ease and comfort. Diamonds blinked down onwards, a glitterous sight of clumps of colours bedecked upon a canvass of ebony.

Bowls and cups of small and large sat straddling tables which were set upon hind legs, overflowing with such different content. Candle lanterns, patterned abstractedly in a vindictive way, swerved through thread loftily stood above, lit the site with a soft light; bringing out a sweet scent of fantasy. Reflected tender seams of light lit the temporary floor of the night, already marred by the marks of shoes and slippers.

A crowd moves in the middle, all swaying to be in this momentous portrait of life at its zenith. Striding softly to the rhythm set by nature and humans alike, together in harmony. An acoustic en grande was all they had, stroking each person, each couple with the swift sensation of delight; of grandeur. Each partner differently dressed as it was accustomed in such an occasion, of swirls and twirl, puffs and huffs, all messed in the fog of participants.

Amidst the shifting crowd, there stood a coat, of deep blue standing amidst the other black and blues of the ocean. The coat marred with wrinkles and obvious movements hung onto shoulders of broad width over an average height. The chivalrous tuxedo was marred with a splash of red long and droopy across his chest, swaying to the shift of the body. Shoes worn down below the pants squeeked and squawked undecidedly across, adding no marks to the floor. The uniform, weaved left and right, with eyes never leaving the destination.

The soft pale yellow perched elegantly atop, as swirls sweet strings framed the beauty that would put shame to others so easily. The exposed neck bathed in the light, arched sideways as if pondering or even falling asleep. A chuckle rumbles in the coat’s chest as eyes surveyed the blonde beauty smile at teases, letting it slide. An appreciative sight of wondrous glory was portrayed again, as pink splashes emerged on soft cheeks as their eyes finally met. Her eyes a wondrous depth of brown, acted as a beacon towards the coated man, snaring each senses making his irrevocably hers just by a look.

. She was by far not the jewel of the party nor was she a ruby but that did not register in his now muddled mind. All he knew were: those eyes beckoning him closer; eyes that he could read as the back of his own hands : the smile slowly arcing through her face; he’s seen a million times. All he could think of was to hold the woman whose beauty of nature outshone others in his eyes. All he wanted was to hold her tight and never let go; for she was everything to him. She was his redeemer of strength, his friend in the dark, the holder of his secrets.

Soft strums of strings serenaded the silent night, as he swiftly strode seeking companionship with his very own
Cinderella.

The Line

2009-06-04T15:27:00.002+08:00

So, I'm thinking
and I'm walking.
I'm feeling fine.

I'm walking
and thinking
that I'm stepping in line.

But now I'm thinking
and looking,
this line I'm walking-

seems to wander a lot;
quite a lot for such
a fine line.

Not that, thinking
while walking
at such a slow pace,

will do me
much good,
if I can't leave this place.

Though if I keep walking
I'm sure I'll fine
a suitable end.

Though, pardon me saying
but I must say,
that line I'm following?

It's all in my head.

A little research gone astray.

2009-05-29T21:01:00.003+08:00

Today in the afternoon, after reading through the add maths textbook to revise *cough cough*
I decided to do a little research you know.. Like per se usual. when I came across a movie poster about.. a movie I watched a few months ago. (last year I believe).

Gabriel : far from grace

GABRIEL tells the story of an Arc Angel who fights to bring light back to purgatory - a place where darkness rules - and save the souls of the city’s inhabitants.

(way cool is my opinion)awesome fight scenes!! AND NICE SOUNDTRACK

It was a pretty cool movie, even if the special effects could be depicted, I still say it was a nice movie to watch on HBO. Albeit a scary one. Don't believe me how scary? Jangan tha pulang~ your bad.
:PReminded me of Lord Voldermort
ahhh crazy scream in that scene.
O.O I'd post more pics of the awesome scenes.. but.. uh.. they are a bit 'disturbing'

Anyhow, it's a very very very very small budget film, it has a way awesome plotline, that I think some people can relate to especially those who've lost their maps. ;P and can't buy compasses. (apakan?) hahahahaha

I'd rate this movie about 4 and a half stars. (it scared the bejeepers out of me especially michael's eyes.)

seriously.made me have nightmares for a while. OKAY. YEA. THE EYES WERE MORE SCARIER CLOSER UP IN ONE SCENE. AHHHH~ hahaha but still cool movie.

Crazy time

2009-05-26T23:43:00.003+08:00

The time to get crazy is coming close.

When?
Right now.

WHY?

Do you know how much we have to study BEFORE JULY?!
Like one Kilometre of books just waiting for to be read by our ever so education hungry eyes.

AGH.
Siao man.
bah kan sambung belajar jua ku ni kan?
ciao crazy short post

News report on 10...9..8..7..6..5..4..3..2..and..1..

2009-05-12T18:20:00.002+08:00

Did you know?

Smiling and laughing is the best exercise for your brain.
It is the most effective way to supply oxygen to the brain. Once you start to smile and laugh, there is joy coming from your heart.

Your brain experiences a transformation simply by laughing one time. If you laugh intensely, you will be using nerves in the brain, as well as facial muscles, that you do not ordinarily use. It is better to laugh for 5 minutes than to exercise for five hours.

So, basically when you look in the mirror, meet other people, or when you are alone in your room, laugh to the fullest! Even if they stare at you like you're insane because your health will be improved and your life will change.

So keep on smiling and laughing people. :)

This report is based on internet research from various websites.
Ciao.
;) Qeel

Words Of The Heart Part 1

2009-04-24T16:21:00.003+08:00

I'm just gonna publish old stories I've written here... aite??

The world is so scary when observed through a window of tears. Distorted images beckon you, disturbingly recognizable like manipulated photographs. Pieces of your life stretched out, blurred, and pooled together in an alternate universe. You know where you are, you've been here before, but nothing looks familiar.

Maybe that's why I can't find you.

I reach, I call out, I fall… I meet the cold, unforgiving ground that offers no relief, no answers.

Where is my safety net? How can protection slip out of one's grasp so quietly? Subtle, it just silently vanishes while I am otherwise diverted.

It leaves, you leave me nothing but the sullen ground with which I become transfixed, riveted, staring at the soil that will someday become my grave. No redemption, no forgiveness…

You can't be gone, not forever.

Forever is a long time…

It's strange how the presence of the ones you love can change everything. The difference between standing in a vacant parking lot and a field of bright aromatic flowers. Each person you love in your life holds a piece of your heart, they live in that space, keep it functioning.
But then without warning, painfully, viciously one of them leaves. Did you know what you were taking with you when you went away? Does it keep you company wherever you are? I miss that part of myself, I miss what you took from the others, I miss you.

We're not flowers anymore. We all just stand together, grey and sullen in a vacant lot, abandoned by sunlight, snubbed by the living and beautiful, waiting for you. The shadows meet us in your place, dark and cold, smirking while we try to find you through the blackness.
But you still don't come, and we wait alone.

Together, but so alone.

When you feel like you have nothing to lose, it's amazing the risks you will take. I've always been told I'm not careful enough, that my headstrong stubbornness will get me into trouble someday. You used to say that sometimes in your quiet, non-offensive way.

But I'm already in trouble, I've already lost, my balance gone with you, with the sunlight and the flowers. There are replacements for the things you took, each of us left with these self-destructive behaviors that linger and mock us. They chip away at the goodness you brought to our lives, threaten to ruin your legacy.

I don't want that, but I'm so scared, so cold. Can't I just sit by the fire for awhile if I promise not to get burnt, would that be so wrong? Can I hold onto this comforter, this blanket that soaks up my tears and chases away the chill?

I just want to know myself again, to live again… if danger makes you feel truly alive, can it really be so harmful? Or am I the one who’s riding without a helmet now?

If I hang on tight, maybe this time I won't fall.

a lazy update

2009-04-22T22:34:00.001+08:00

Okay. this is today's post. Now. there. this counts as an update...doesn't it?
hahahah malas ku bah. esuk saja tah nah..
:P

an update?

2009-04-04T21:50:00.008+08:00

Rain pellets hit the window pane, making a clatter through the whole of room. You're sitting ontop of the bed, crosslegged staring aimlessly into the darkness. The face glitters in the darkness, reflecting the moonlight splayed into the potrait of the room. It's hands slowly moving, making a clicking sound, irritating and twisting nerves you never knew you had. The face tells you something, plaguing you with responsibilities and flowing the feel of dread and fatigue.

The face tells you it's one in the morning.

"Damn it"

You exhale, feeling faint, it's been a while. Your eyes burn in their sockets, daringly pleading you to drop into the comforting quilt and sink into that welcoming pillow, so near you; within your grasp. But you dare not.

Exhausted your brain's just about to break down, no, you won't. You can't.

You do.

The rebel in you forces you to rest, to hold you captive helpless to the wilies of a the monster of the night. As your head falls to the soft landing fitting your heart races and stops entirely at the same moment, sending you to the realm of unconciousness.

You fall asleep.

Ensnared you feel the breath in your lungs rush out, as your met with the scene that has been playing through your brain all day, like a broken record. The words reverberate through the air, twisting your throat, the slaps of curt answers pierced the air and you feel your blood freeze.

The sight infront of your eyes, you can't forget; you doubt you ever will.

The strangled figure of courage on the floor, it's blood imprinted to the wall of your mind. Charred is your concience as you hear words that should not be uttered, accusations raised to the air and chartered through you by calculative figures, shaded glasses, tightened strings of anger.

You stand for what you believe in, rigidly repeating, trying to stope the battle raging on. A fighter, they said, you were always a fighter, always trying to find an advantage for tactical resevere.

The problem is, you notice, being a fighter, you can't handle this. The feeling inside you, gripping you to the core. Staring and absorbing the view presented, the mangled gasp struggling through your bruised lips, yearning to stop the senselessness of the situation.

Shackled to weakness, you can't do anything; you're helpless. You hate being helpless, and that is what you are, powerless against the rushing stream of clenched fists and boneless features.

Nothing in this world, has felt this bad, not kicks nor punches could beat this feeling of pure terror, overwhelming you.

Eyes glued to the brutality towards that sole voice that you've heard so many times; joked with.

You urge it to stop, the the violence to the voice, to fucking put a cork in. But no, it repeats, and you fall.

'Holy crap', you think, as you see the structure fall beyond rails of safety.

Breath hitches, as contradicting natures of thoughts clash as you dash at the sign of life, at the edge. Seemingly stumbling steps meet your beaten legs, and in the middle, a hole holding so much more. Behind the barrel, a face you've known for a while, that perhaps you've trusted just a bit, and you thank god for your nature.

They bring you to the red scene, painted with agony, where an armless and faceless spot of life twitched to live. You do what you can, you help just a bit, to redeem, to apologize. Shadows surround you, but you see an inkling of light; perhaps a shade of faith and hope.

But it quickly dissipates, as reality guts you, shadows will engulf them as they did to you; fully dismantling bravery through numerous ways of darkness.

'Go,' screams bravery.

Justice was never just, but the shot ran through your spine, as the aim was true. Unappeased, again blurred shots of misconception twice punctures the head of courage. Skidded blood skewed your hearing, as it was impaired by an explosion of fragmented pale pieces befell on you.

Red is the last thing you see, blue turning to red; a harsh image. Laughter and screams intertwining in between each loop; weaving into your memory. The clinks of fallen bullets and twisted bones burned to mind. Horror-strcken, gaunt-like eyes, staring at you, haunting you every second.

You wake up screaming, sweating cold sweat, heart beating faster than before.

You tell yourself it's just a dream, but a little voice whispers it might happen.

Fear takes it's toll, and you dare not wink at all.

The fighter in you, fights the demons to bay, and you sit up and stare again, feeling helpless. Stars above making sure you have company as thoughts and images of that fated horror.

That night, you do not sleep at all.

A sacrifice

2009-03-13T21:45:00.002+08:00

He won’t make it.

He’ll never get through, he knows he won’t. With every trudge of his foot down the path; he knew he wouldn’t make it. Each second; each grasp of breath he takes now, could be his last. No, he knows they will be his last.

He can’t explain it, can’t elaborate the feelings in his gut. Controversial instincts clash in his body. Brain, Heart, Muscle; all, battling for control.

Heart thumping, sending bloodless oxygen spiraling through capillaries of wood, to give and take, to give and take. Always a reason for giving, always a reason to give. For every choice there is a reason. Also a consequence.

Muscles constricting arteries, dilating veins; vice versa. Simultaneously. Spasms jittering fiber, bone and sense through cells. Moving, respiring, living, for the last time. Spluttering responses, letting instinct run a lost race.

Brain shifting through, each memory, each feeling, categorizing each memoir, trying to see sense, searching an escape to live out an alternative. Analyzing each discarded possibility, repeatedly; obsessively.

Each of his strength tantalizingly dances with his weakness in a time without space, in a place where there is no light, no darkness. He walks mechanically to his destination.

Never has he felt this desperate, this dire for him to lay it all bare.
Never has he marched to battle without a plan.
To dance along with an unknown beat.

Yet he continues, plunging into unchartered waters. Marching through an unknown abyss of darkness. Shameless guilt set upon the path.

For her. All for her. Her; the wearer of probing eyes. The sniffer of problems, He did this all for her. For her to smile, to laugh.

Even if it’s without him. He’d give away everything for her; even his life. He’d sacrifice his soul for her.

The only chance for her to live again, was for him to give a sacrifice on the altar of happiness and pride. His happiness for hers, his dignity for her life.

He’d have to give away a part of his heart. He knows deep inside, a knowledge which supports the chances of him making it through were slim to none. Anyway, if he was able to go through, he won’t be able to be who he was. A runner, a basketball player.

He’d be less of who he was. less of who he had become.

Ironic, through out his short 15 years of life, he’d never been so keen on making his sister laugh.
Till now.

Random sproutings

2009-03-10T16:45:00.002+08:00

"Once upon a time..."
A beautiful beginning to a tantalizing tale, a classic adored by others, fantasized by children and humoured by adults. Humans selfishly dwell on these stories, forgetting reality for a while. Even if it's just for an hour or a few minutes, you sometimes sit down and ponder on mindless questions, yearning for our own happy ending.

Happy endings are never coming, does cartoons are lies. trechorously stringing all of us along for a ride, flaunting something we'll never have. And we'll yearn for it even more, deluding ourselves of reality.

As the caged bird screams, we dream.

We dream of sunsets by the beach where we'd picnic, dream of a whole life filled with joy and delight. Masking our own reality, not knowing without reality there can be no truth. But we happily do so.

Believing a hoax.
Trusting a lie.

for ignorance is bliss.

An Advantage to a Power Shortage

2009-02-24T21:19:00.001+08:00

They lay out on the damp grass, staring up at the stars. Her head rested on his chest and their fingers were laced together.

“So beautiful.” She whispered. Being out here during a power shortage was amazing. There were no lights to deter the beauty of the stars.

“Yeah.” He smiled at her. To him, her beauty was much greater than the stars.

She leaned her head to kiss him.

“Summer nights, no lights, what a sight.” She grinned at his rhyme.

“You’re a dork.”

“But I’m your dork.”

“Yes, that you are. Always and forever.” And they kissed again.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I know..mushy.. tacky..and so totally cliche.kill me.we all need them in our life..one way or another.. :P

To be remembered.

2009-02-07T22:17:00.003+08:00

"Because life is boring"

The words raspy in the cold night air, echoes as it bounces of the walls of the room. Voicing reason, showing logic, for the adolescent teen. Standing in the corner, leaning onto the wall just like he always was.

"No it's not.

Each day, is an adventure. No matter how small or uneventful, each choice we make and each thought we ponder on, changes our future. Each and every of our action paths a way through, and each of our words slashes through the wild. An adventure doesn't mean having adrenalin soaring through your body, your heart beating at the speed of light. An adventure is a journey, a journey which brings you to another place, another destination.

So in a way, each day you live, is each day you're closer to another place.Get it?"

The girl's voice: strong and turgid. Ringing in the cracks in the ceiling and walls.

"Done with the sermon?"

A smug face appearing on his gaunt features. Teasing the girl for her speech.

"Call it as you may, but you shouldn't do this. You know you shouldn't."

Voicing her opinion, reprimanding the boy for his lack of insight.

"I've had enough of this so called journey,I always end up being in the same place. Life sucks. Life is unfair."

Assured words of the boy, resignation flowing through.Hands steady and ready.

"Life is fair through it's unfairness"

Yet she remains adamant, persisting against, what he was going to do. Stubbornly attempting to stop him.

" Tell that to those who suffer, who have mothers who blame them, who become frustration outlets, whose life are so deranged that they feel like they're floating through life, with no purpose. Tell them. Life is FAIR. That it's fair for them to go through crap everyday, it's fair that they face against dangers constantly. "

Anger resounded in his voice, frustration leaking out. Hurt seen pass through the visor. Slowly he pointed it to his head. It's nearly time.

"Ethan, don't do this. Please. I'm begging you, Don't."

Her tone was desperate.

Ethan looked at her, his English partner, a nobody.
Cynthia Kent. No one to him.

But as she stood in the doorway, affixed and firm. Looking at him with determination, he couldn't help feel happy. His hands are steady, fingers are ready.

Atleast someone'll witness it and remember.

Smiling, Ethan Mayne pulled the trigger of the colt 45.

2009-02-06T22:51:00.002+08:00

It's official.

Ask me a Straight maths question, even add maths. I'd have a chance of answering.I swear.

Twist them?
I lose my brain.
Really I do. I am NOT joking.
It's not even hilarious.
yea.Yea.It's just me I guess.It feels like..the numbers are twisting and forming itself into snakes slowly squeezing my trachea till I can't breathe.

Physics, You? Please please stick into my head.
please?
Malay,
Please, please co-operate, I have ideas.
God knows I have ideas, but I can't seem to express it.
please?

And you, You dear.
Yes. Maths and add maths.
I know you don't like me.
I don't like you too.
But PLEASE FOR GODS SAKE.
I BEG OF YOU.
LET'S CALL IT A TRUCE YEA?
Jeez.

and it's also official.
I've lost my mind.

an ooc day.

2009-02-04T23:05:00.003+08:00

O.O

WWOOHHHOOO!

APAKAN??
Random. ".-

For the boy who shall never grow up

2009-01-29T19:38:00.005+08:00

"You see that? You see that? I saw it! I saw it! I told you so! I saw it! SEE!!"
A shrill voice came from the blue-tiled roof of 56 Foderstew Street, echoing into the abyss of the night.

There laid two friends of opposite gender spread out, looking out into the night sky. To the left there laid a boy, wearing a polo and hip fitting trousers, his neat cut and also spotlessly decked with a cheesy sweater (which he claimed his 'dear old grandmother' had given him) was absurdly contrasted with his friend's appearance. Her laidback appearance, consisted of a t-shirt and a pair of jeans that were not hip-hugging nor were they 'butt-falling'. Her hair pulled up to a messy pony-tail, this girl was normal. Except that she was pointing excitedly to what the boy deemed as an empty sky, as he was to busy keeping his eyes shut.

"There's nothing up there, Kaylie.Just the sky." stated the solemn voice of the absurdly bland-looking boy.

"Oh come on Adam! Look just look. There it is.Second star to the right! It's shining so brightly, Impossible if you can't see it." insisted the pony-tailed brunnete.

"Kaylie, I know what I know, and I know a lot more than you do." smug superiority shining through his words naturally.

Kaylie looked at her best friend, baffled at his stubborn stupidity.

"Adam, come on, be a good sport! Just open your eyes! I swear ontop of my bubble-gum collection there it is, Adam. Just open your eyes and see."

Frustration and impatience dwindled in her, as Adam once again refused to open his eyes.
Patience was never a preseverance for the short-fused wit of a girl, and doing drastic dramatic actions were the things she had thrills from.

Whispering vehement warnings and urgings to the blonde green-eyed boy next to her, she crouched herself into position.

" Adam, If you don't open your eyes, I swear, I'll jump.I swear I will."

Adam startled and alarmed by the lack of warmth by his side, quickly sat up. His wide eyes ,as wide as his mother's dinner plates, met with her grinning azure.

Adam felt his heart skipped a beat as he stared into the playful blues of hers.

"God, Kaylie. I thought you'd really done it! Great Jove, you gave me a scare. Kaylie I feel like I'm having a heart attack here!" Kaylie observed her friend turn red as a cherry, as he proclaimed this.

"I always knew you were a drama queen at heart Adam. Don't worry, I'm okay with homosexual people.I swear." her retort made him roll his eyes at her and laugh.

"Fine, fine Kaylie, my eyes are yours to dictate."

His friend of two years snickered at this, and quickly scooted herself to him pointing to the stars above them. As she was to busy exclaiming and telling him quotes pin-pointing the exact location of the star she was so overjoyed with founding, Adam took a good look to his dear friend. Her mouth was moving in such a rapid session that it was running against the speed of sound.Nose having a bump after a rough childhood, made sense as her eyes were slanted and hid the fierce blue reciding in her irises.

" Adam? Adam? Are you even paying attention to me?" Kaylie asks a very zoned out Adam.

Woken up from his analyzation of her face, Adam shamefully shakes his head. Sighing Kaylie looks at her dear friend and shakes her head along.

"I know you never have or will beleive in PeterPan but come on..Just look for me? Just see.you'll see I'm right."

"Can you blame me? Come on. We're 16 Kaylie, not 12. We can't just keep beleiving in flying never-growing boys in green tights."

Smiling ever so sadly, Kaylie again shaked her head to Adam's point of reason.

"It's not the character that you pay attention to, it's the symbol he brings Adam. He symbolizes youth and joy."

Hearing a start for another of his friend's preaching sermons on Disney's subtle ways of relaying a messages he could not resist making a face. Kaylie seeing Adam's apparent lack of seriousness on the matter snapped and got to the point.

"Oh great, that's very mature Adam. Very mature. But you have to admit, Peter pan does bring joy. He's so care-free and fun, that he just brings the best out of the audience. You know?"

"So let me get this straight Kaylie, Peter pan brings the best out of a person?"

Nodding and smiling contentedly that Adam was paying her attention, she took the opportunity to show him, what she thought was the star of Neverland.

As she again pointed out to one of the light in the skys, urging him to look, Adam stole a glance at Kaylie, and couldn't help thinking,

"You're my peter pan."

*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*

Dedicated to the memory of my Brother, Ahmad Aqeel Bin Ahmad Sanusi, whom god had bestowed the gift of an eternally sin-free youth .30-01-06

To My dear brother:
Fly bro, fly. I'll see you someday.
Till next year. Ciao.

Rain

2009-01-17T20:57:00.003+08:00

Thunder rumbles as you enter.
and there lightning strikes,
masking a noise of mixture.
Thunder rumbling and lightning striking.
And rain falls.

You stare at the floor,
as you feel hit by hit.
At the back,
you whelp; there again.
You're upright, face down
to the floor. Can't breathe.
can't hear.All you see are
Doubles. A blurry world
all around you.

You breathe again as it stops.
the rain.for a moment, as if
thinking.
Thinking rain.
Before it breaks, and falls
upon you, ever so stronger.
As if enraged.

Breathe you say,
instructing your body to do so.
Breathe you say,
a mantra to remind yourself.
Breathe you say,
a note to remember.
Breathe you say,
for fear to live.

So there you are.
Laying under the rain,
the thunder roaring in the background,
the lightning striking spots.
and you can't help but think.

"I love the rain."

Conclusions.

2009-01-16T18:47:00.003+08:00

You're in a car.
Not just a car.
It's a BMW.

It has red walls.
Not just red walls.
Blood red walls.

There's a speaker.
Not just a speaker.
A speaker in the middle seat.

You have a weight on your lap.
You look next to you, a shadow.
You peer front, a voice.

Not just weights.
Not just shadows.
Not just voices.

Not just weights you'd happily carry.
Not just shadows you'd teasingly wait for.
Not just voices you'd patiently listen to.

Weightless weights.
Illuminating shadows.
Listening voices.

You look again.
No, not just someone.
Not just somebody.
Not just anybody.

You grin and let out a laugh.
Not weights,
Not shadows,
Not voices.

Friends.

Crossroads.

2009-01-09T16:23:00.003+08:00

why why why why why?

why 'why'?

Must our curiosity pique into such enormous heights that even Mount Everest would seem like a foot note?

Don't look at me ,or the screen like that. Now stop making my look.yea that Look.the one with the raised eyebrow and moving of the ears? yea that one too.No scrunching up your forehead there.Stop.

Shakespeare was wrong THE question is and was NOT "to Be or not to Be."

I have a question.Not THE question but just an old normal question which I randomly sprout here and then.Have you ever been met with two choices and you can't choose?
Really not like all those drama queen questions.Like:-
"does he love me or not?"
Jeez, do I look like I know the question? Go ask him.
"Like Oh My god, what am I gonna wear tomorrow?"
Here's a clue.Starts with a C..ends with an S. in between there's L O T H E..Now put that together.It's CLOTHES.W0w.check your wardrobe.

Such flimsy excuses of stress-starters should be flung out of the window.Literally.Go on.Jump.
*GRIN*Maybe you'll fly.

Sorry, but I'm just typing things out.Nothing personal.so if ANYONE is reading this Don't jump out of the window. Really.I was kidding.Just my sarcasm getting the best of me.

Now back to the issue on board.

How do you choose with a risk so high that you just might die?
and if you don't choose you'd be choosing anyway.

To do or not to do.
That IS the Question.

And I remember.

2009-01-04T13:51:00.004+08:00

Today, I was just getting ready for tomorrow when it hit me.

The 4E days are over.
With the starting of tomorrow others would be sitting in our class.
With the breaking of sunlight 4E, our 4E, would be gone.
and be replaced with a new one.

Our seats, Our tables handed over to others so single-handedly, so easily, with no introductions. Tomorrow we'd be giving our class, nay our home, to strangers.

I still remember the 1st day I went to class, there was a puddle near the door. and I sat in between 2 girls.One was being all shy and the other was cleaning her pencil case.

I remember National Day, where we all got slightly sun-burnt.
I remember the day, I called Caroline 'nenek' and she called me 'cucu'
I remember the Shared laughter over our Shared lunch.
I remember monkey-ing around with Jiggy's pencil case.
I remember singing 'Viva la Janice-nis-nis-nis' along With Sherly and the dancing animals.;)
I remember arguing with Pey Yi about Pride and Prejudice.
I remember Mich and me laughing over OUR OWN jokes.
I remember Sherly going hyper, which I was shocked.
I remember Janice's sweet sixteen, where She wore a pink strapless dress.
I remember making our Name Alliteration list with Rai and Sherly.

And I remember.

I remember arguing Ms Ani about the poem 'old familiar faces'
I remember the hint of pride in her voice when she congratulated me on my work.
I remember Cikgu Rashidah letting out a giggle due to our lame jokes.
I remember Sir Raymee bullying me just for the sake of it.
I remember Sir Khairul laughing uproariously over our antics.
I remember Ms Angela giving in to our behaviour and going along with it.
I remember Ms Lau's faint smile at the jokes we were tossing all over the place.
I remember Sir Zainal scaring the wits out of us all with his threats.
I remember him and his Lame sarcastic jokes.
I remember Ms Ling getting our Lame bug.

And I remember.

I remember Muiz who seemed to always smile.
I remember Nabil, our own original Tybalt.
I remember Mozi, the designer of our class (albeit rarely seen)
I remember Nazhrah, the often late PRS.
I remember Michelle, the lotion freak and my partner in yellow.
I remember Dina, the small petite giggler.
I remember Belle, her bubbly attitude and snortty laughter.
I remember Rai , her random-ness and getting high over sweets.
I remember Sherly, the smirk of the 'o lame one' and Funny attitude
I remember Shaz, her funny antics and acting abilities.
I remember Ashraf,his humour and acts of being gay with Zul.
I remember Syahmi, the ever playing Rubix cube man of the class.
I remember Aale, the one who won the drinking contest.
I remember Zul, the funny gay mate of Ashraf who always had a comment.
I remember Jiggy, the photographer of the class and also class monitor.
I remember Pey Yi, the class's perfectionist and her spoilt antics.
I remember Janice, her ability to sleep through any class.
I remember Auzee, and her Auraful presence filling the class.
I remember Siti, gushing over Romance and being all sensible.
I remember Caroline, the 'o great one' making people walk with no legs.
I remember Fifah, her giggle and her way of talking in front of people.
I remember Rezha, our Mini Ms Ling and anak Cikgu Rubiah.

and I remember.

"Exccuuu~~~se me?"
"Lost yourself? buy the self-finder"
"The Great Bimbotic one has spoken"
"To face constipation, we need constant patience"
"haha *snort snort* I wanna be piglet"
"Like Oh My god. you know like Oh my god"
"Bimbo alert,bimbo alert"
"MICHELLE POSE!"
"4 elephants"
" the giggly and happy girls"
"hafiz.no wait haziq?"
"thus with a kiss I die~"
"when you look me in the eyes~"
"mama gajah"
"Jollibee!"
"Give me the corntos! or face the wrath of my nose plucker!"
"writing causes skin cancer.."
" Free show~!"

These moments, these people I'll remember.
In between the heart and the head.
I'll remember.

Fell in love.

2009-01-03T16:05:00.006+08:00

It all started like an ordinary day, of any other day.
I got up, showered, dressed up, ate, did a few notes, and started surfing the net.
Of course second to writing stories and reading them, I like to see them in motion.
so off I went to you-tube on my surfboard, roaming around the web.
when it hit me.A video, the last video on the related videos list. It said

"The Official Keith Movie Trailer"
and there was a picture of Jesse McCartney.
Don't get me wrong, I didn't do it just because his face was in it, but I was intrigued.
So I checked it out.

Okay at the starting of this I was like.."Boring~.."
but then the few lines said near the end..around 1.20 to 1.25 I was shocked and impressed.
Nice twist.
Then..
around "1.40 - 1.46" my curiousity was piqued into a very high level of SAPPINESS and of course sarcasm.
Curiosity killed me I guess, and as I moved the arrow to the link, I unknowingly sealed my fate.
I spent around hours watching the movie; all of it .
And I died.
through out the dialogue, and the acting, the passion, the raw emotion.
I DIED. and got re incarnated just to be awed again.
and I fell in love with it.

The script was understandable, realistic.
The plot was see-through I had thought at first, but had twists. making me question and re-evaluate.
The acting was okay, the..

Wait,what am I saying?
The acting was okay?

No It was Good.real good. I haven't been blown away as much for a movie before.
Not even twilight.Which slightly disappointed me by the way.
No this movie..is a must see.Trust me (if you can). watch these videos. these are a few of my favourites.

and if you want the movie check you-tube out and type in "keith movie part 1"
or..type this out. http://www.megavideo.com/?v=DS497211

In the name of Santa Claus and funny songs about him.

2008-12-30T09:19:00.004+08:00

I know I should've posted this on the 25th but hey..what can you do?

"Procrastinator!!"

Ms Angela would be so proud..Not.xp
ANYWAYS for this ho-ho christmas I cooked up a story, based on a song I GOOGLED, of which I do NOT own. Though it's funny but NO. I DO NOT OWN THE BLOOMING SONG FEATURED IN THIS FIC.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

A four year-old Rebecca McKnight opened an eye as she listened carefully. The other popped open and she sat up in bed, staring at the ceiling in wonder.

There it was again! She had heard it! The clicking of tiny reindeer hooves on the roof! Santa was here!

Beka slowly crept out of bed and tiptoed to her bedroom door. She remembered Mommy telling her about how Santa would know if she was awake and wouldn’t leave her anything if she was, but it was a risk Beka was willing to take, she had to see Santa. Reaching up, Rebecca just barely reached the knob and turned it with the pads of her finger.

She continued to sneak down the hall, the dark wooden floor cold under her bare feet. Now, which room would Santa go? Would he leave the presents under the tree in her parents room? Or how about the one in the dining room? Beka frowned.

A noise from the living room caught Rebecca’s attention. Aha! There was a tree there too! That had to be where Santa had come down!

Nerves began to get to Rebecca as she made her way towards the door, so she began to softly sing a song her mom had giggled through dinner earlier.

But the song died in her throat as she nudged the door open a crack so she could see inside. A quiet gasp fled from her throat as her eyes drank in what she saw.

It was Santa! The Santa Claus! There he was, beard, red suit, fat tummy, everything! He leaned over his sack and pulled out a gift and put it under the tree decorated with home-made ornaments she and mommy had made. Rebecca had to use the self-control she could muster to not run into the room and tackle the big guy.

After Santa had emptied his sack, he moved to her stocking hung over the fireplace. Rebecca held her breath as Santa withdrew her letter, which she had written herself this year, and opened it. Santa read the letter and Rebecca silently prayed that he would grant it, it was what she wanted most in the whole world.

“Uhh, Rebecca is wishing for a baby brother or sister.” Santa said, to whom Rebecca had no idea. But she did note that his voice was awfully familiar.

“She does?” A voice answered, one Beka immediately recognized as her mother’s.

Sure enough, her mother appeared and went to read the letter Santa held out to her. She stifled a gasp, then a giggle as she read Rebecca’s messy handwriting.

“That’s why she didn’t want my help writing her letter this year.” Kira realized, gently taking the letter from Santa’s hand.

“Well, maybe we should oblige her.” Santa quirked, a naughty lilt tainting his voice. Beka rejoiced inwardly, Santa was going to grant her wish!

Kira laughed humorlessly and replied, “Then you carry it for nine months and give birth to it.”

Rebecca felt her lower lip droop as she glowered at her mother, the spoil-sport.

“Aw, come on. It’s Beka’s wish. After all, we always got what we wanted for Christmas.” Santa remarked, pulling Kira close to him. “Well, I certainly did.”

Rebecca blinked in confusion. “What the-”

Kira chucked softly as she draped her arms around Santa’s neck. “I don’t know about you, but I’m still waiting for the pony I asked for.”

Santa laughed, but no the Ho Ho Ho as Rebecca had expected. And again, the laugh was familiar. Rebecca was confused, and she didn’t like the way her mother was behaving with Santa Claus. Where was Daddy?

The stereo system began to harmonize. “I saw Mommy kissing, Santa Claus. Underneath the mistletoe last night!”

Rebecca’s eyed widened as she tried to comprehend what she was seeing. Kira leaned forward and laid a soft kiss on Santa’s mouth. The only other person Rebecca had ever seen her mother kiss like that was her father... Daddy!

“Oh, what a laugh it would have been, if Daddy had only seen, Mommy kissing Santa Claus last night!” The singers exclaimed from the stereo and Rebecca burst into the room. Planting her hand on her hips and rasing her chin in hard anger, Rebecca demanded. “Mommy! What are you doing?”

As shocked as she was, Kira automatically shoved Santa away from her. Santa, unfortunately, fell back into the tree, knocking it over.

“Oh, no.” Kira mumbled, then watched in shock as the gold star on top of the tree flew off and twirled, suspended momentarily in the air before falling. Santa had been struggling to get off the tree, but his bulk in front was making it very difficult. Moments later, the very pointy star landed precariously close to his head, causing him to double his efforts with widened eyes.

Kira immediately flew to Santa’s side, lifting him up out of the tree as well as she could. Muttering something about Conner putting on more than a little weight, she blushed. Finally, ‘Santa’s’ head was resting on her lap and Kira hesitated to take off the hat and beard in front of her daughter.

“Conspiring to take me out already, are you?” ‘Santa’ mumbled, much to Beka’s horror.

Kira glared at the man, tempted to take that beard of his and snap it one good time. But a sniffle stopped her from considering it any longer. She watched as tears filled Rebecca’s eyes and began to spill over her cheeks.

Rebecca ran a sleeve over her cheeks, then looked down at her mother with disbelief. “Mommy, you nearly kil-”

But Kira cut her daughter off when she sighed and looked down at her husband. “I know, I know... I nearly killed Santa Clause.”
(for my uncle, cheers where ever you may be)

A little down in the dumps.

2008-12-15T23:07:00.002+08:00

Your footsteps echo in the empty hallway, as you step on each tile precisely.
Your legs move on their own accord, knowing each tile as it's friend.
Your arms sway a bit, as if trying to fly.
Your eyes set on your destination.
Her.
and you know that she knows.
she knows you're there.
and she knows you know.
So she smiles at you, though knowing that you'd know it isn't true.
and she parts her chapped lips,
'you came?'
with the expression that always amused you.
Smirk in tact, she laughs at you,though you know she doesn't.
her eyes challenging you to move,you do.
she remains at her spot, not moving.
You step closer; and she does move.
she shoves her hand forward,
with such force, in an awkward position.
grasped in her disoriented fingers: a package,neatly packed and cared for.
You take it.
' thanks'
she shrugs
'happy birthday'
and moves around you; she's leaving you.
panic. you move forward grab her hand.
your eyes delve into hers.
her eyes now a steely mocca, held such strength that you let her go.
You know she knows what you were going to do.
even before you did.
She turns away from you, and walks strongly down the corridor
you stare as she retreats back to her life.
With a sigh, you let out
the three most infamous words.
'I love you'
You see her stride begin to drag.
You see her slowly loosen.
but still keeps moving forward.
But you don't hear what she wants to say.
she keeps her peace and moves on.
with the words haunting her:
'I know'

you had nothing to lose.
She did.

updates updates

2008-12-13T21:39:00.002+08:00

Hello world!
it's been a long while since I've posted yarr..
What can I say..I was.. uh..having a catastrophic time in moving my limbs to visit this website and log in..
in other words = Lazy.:P

Anyways..been busying myself with cleaning the whole house, now it seems that I've taken over the post 'house cleaner' by day and by night I'm reading..books..that I've read over and over again..but I actually don't mind really.. cause I'm gonna buy more at KK this 20th! :) :)

and ohh yea thanks to a friend of mine, I now have a new alter ego.
not only am I the 'o sarcastic one' and 'o addicted analyst' but I am also 'the mighty twister of words'

XP I can't help but feel happy..I don't know why. most probably because of the ride with my bro was very amusing.x)

scene *
hazeeq is sitting there looking out at awe at a car.
hazeeq:ka, that's my limo you know!
qeelah: yea yea and that's my horse.
hazeeq: astagh...tunggu saja..kalau hazeeq naik bah..banyak orang teriak "superstar!"
qeelah: and then they say "whoops salah..sumo rupanya"
*cue punch from the sensitive boy.
end scene*

random stuff I had with hazeeq:
'mayday mayday, the worm has entered,the worm has entered'
'if quizzes are quizzical..what are tests?'
'The stork is pecking, the stork is pecking.wait don't push yet!?!'
'hallooo~ my banana phone is monkey-ing out on me!'
'Bugga bugga...beli beli..bugga bugga'
'hahahehehehehahahahahhohohohohoh'
'If I'm a hippo then what are you?' 'a stick insect'
'ka you can't run..sal you have two balloons.' 'well you have five in your stomach'
'uh?' 'I bet the table would catch on faster than you'

Out of sorts.

2008-12-03T20:49:00.004+08:00

It's Official.
I am now officially suffering from a serious rare psychological malfunction virus,that has managed to dodge my auto-immune system of which is injecting demented and twisted projectiles into my brain,i.e. my temporal lobe.

The virus has engulfed my sensory and nerve system.
Yes, seriously.
I'm not kidding.
It's the only rational,objectively logical reason.

Because I did NOT do a past year in ADD MATHS.
I did NOT make notes about the first few chapters of 'PNP'.
I did NOT imagine doing another CHEMISTRY paper 3.
I did NOT rehearse my BM composition 'skills'.
I did NOT read and re-read my BIOLOGY notes.
I did NOT grammar proof ALL of my stories.
I did NOT attempt to try to understand PHYSICS.
I did NOT do that.
I did NOT.
NO, I DID NOT DO THAT.
I did not do that.

Please god, I didn't do that right?
Oh man.
I did.
yes I did.
Oh no.I did.
in a short span of two days.
Jeez what's happening to me?

It's gotta be that virus.
That damned virus.
that's making me study.
Okay. maybe I should do an open surgery on my brain and fry it with a lightning rod?
maybe that'll fix my obsession with studying.
I Sure hope so It will.
cause I don't have a spare one.

SIGH.

2008-11-30T14:15:00.003+08:00

Jeez I am so blanked out now.

Hmm..my brain is running at full speed now..hahah is that even possible ? my brain doesn't have legs! I think.

You see.. today is the first day of the holidays.
The holidays.
T-H-E-H-O-L-I-D-A-Y-S.
Yep.
AND I AM SO BORED..

it's the first day and I'm already bored, hahah I'm hopeless?!

It was so absurd when In the middle of checking a few websites.. I had a sudden impulse to do my 'homework'. so off I went to my room and when I was pulling out my pencil case did it register to me..I had none.

SO I just stared off in my room, and saw the past year papers.
SIGH.
Sadly, I guess My brain suffered from short sanity loss cause the next thing I knew.. I was actually opening the pages to my Bio Notes and past year papers.

Now Isn't that sad?

Thank god I came to my senses and dragged myself to the computer to my blog,of which I've neglect of feeding it with posts.
And now I so Don't know what to write.

Guess I'll start playing games or something like that..
later I'll do an exercise course..as usual..
but then..I don't know what to do!!

AH.sigh..I think tonight I'll so some studying lah..kay..yea...
shivers* what is going on with me??

2008-11-30T14:11:00.002+08:00

1. Take a recent picture of yourself or take a picture of
yourself right now.

2. Don't change your clothes, don't fix your hair... Just
take a picture.

3. Post that picture with NO editing.

4. Post these instruction with your picture.

5. Tag 5 people to do this.

Jeez Worlikers.. hmm..I tag : uh Rai, Janice, Fisah, Cat, and Jul.
:P

So deserving.

2008-11-22T19:22:00.002+08:00

You see her.
Her eyes ;red
like from the dead.
Her hair; a mess,
with no reason,
to see through.
Her fingers;white
from the scar.
Her nose;swollen
from the rough tissue.
Her ears; bled
from the endless beat.
Her lips; parched,
contrasting with her cheeks.
Her figure broken,
laid as pieces.
Her posture,
was of depletion.
She was broken.
You turn your head.
You knew this would happen
you look at her once again,
then stare at else where.
you can not take the view.
You need to get out
Quick.You move
towards the door.
You glance at her,
as disgust and pity
steeled your choice.
You take the knob,
removing your presence,
leaving nothing,
except for the stamp
sending her spiraling
down below.

"that's what you get, when you let your heart win."

When writing fails.

2008-11-20T19:50:00.002+08:00

The words in your brain;
beginning to swirl out of hand.
You have to write.
You need to write.
You take a breath.
And Plunge.
All the words, stumbling clumsily onto the paper;
Reincarnating a scene,
remaking a memory,
reliving a life,
Revisiting the past.
Of which secrets were laid bare,
where feelings were openly displayed,
when wit was a tool of knowledge
and sarcasm was everything;
the marks of annoyance,
the strength of anger,
the tenderness of interest,
the softness of caring.
You breathe again,
after letting that out.
You hope for the best.
But.
then a silver ray beacons to you,
blinding you, as you grope
all around you for resistance.
The light beckons you to delve more.
More into your mind,
the sea of emotions, fought against
strained and locked.
Too much.
Too much.
You can not breathe.
You struggle, you claw
you throat trying to breathe.
Too much.
So you grab on the nearest thing,
an excerpt or knowledge,
like a drowned swimmer would,
and hope that one day the sea would evaporate,
or drain.
grasping the object,rather obsessively,
like children with their toys,
Your hands are now bleeding,
you've held the object too strong,
but it can not be helped.
So you keep holding on.
you keep holding on, for the sake of living.
you hold on for the sake of sanity.
you hold on for the fear of drowning,
into the deep blue sea.

A tribute to 4E

2008-11-19T18:14:00.005+08:00

18/11/08.(yesterday)

The MA4's BIG TALENT SHOW.(I know that's really not the name but yea..xp)

At first, everyone was out of it.and I mean seriously.we were all VERY OUT OF IT..

*Sigh*

In the few early hours, even being after promoted to form 5E, chaos and emotions were high.In a not so good way.Last minute adjustments and reminders were drafted out, Arguments about morale and beliefs, and also about several significant but small details.

All this happened around 9 o'clock.

Wonder how we squeezed in all of those action packed fights and quarrelsome arguments in WHILE cleaning our new yet temporary classroom. ah.well. must be a talent of ours.

After taking care of that, a few selected few went into the audi for sound check and MORE last minute planning and discussion.Then, the moment came, when we would finally see either it was all worth it.All the stay-backs, the death of brain cells, the threat of laryngitis, the sleep lost to thoughts, the arguments proceeded and decisions wavered to and fro.
The moment of redemption over past performances, the high time of over-writing the past and turning a new leaf.

We were the second in line to perform.

On the stage, all were running amok, trying to set up the classroom scene. and even trying to locate the microphones.everybody was nervous,and most feared the repeat disastrous performance of Romeo and Juliet.Swearing was screamed under breath, and all thoughts were focused on getting through the play over and done with.

Quarter way through the play, nerves started to settle and it felt just like practice where it was just us.No audience, No Points, No photographers No judges.
It was just like when we were hanging out in our so called 'e-lit class' where we had our moments both good and bad, where wit and patience were threaded on.It felt like home.

Before I knew it, we were wrapping it up, with a very last minute ending.(xp "the end").
And soon three of the most releived people were at the back, giving hoots of encouragement and claps for all.

We were loud.clapping, laughing and also having a jolly good time.That felt good.Laughing and joking around at the back, watching other plays and listening intently to a certain pianist's song.*cough caroline shie cough*

As the back row squatters, watched other class plays, I started to guess the winners. (Of which I got right for only the 1st place winner). when it was the prize giving ceremony,(at the end lah tu) when they announced the name of the third place prize winner of $40. Jaws dropped, eyes popped and I couldn't help but released a startled shout. ("WHAT?!?!").

We won third place.

We couldn't beleive it..that they had to announce our class was in third place a second time.
That's when it sinked in.We really couldn't beleive it.Well, what at first was actually just a stepping stone for turning a new leaf,was a lead to actual triumph? Wow.

True we just got third place.But at that time, at that moment, for me, that was all I could've asked for.

And so I end this post with a rare gesture from me.

I would like to thank EVERYBODY in 4E.No matter what role they played.Either making props, dishing out ideas, lashing out opinions, acting out the parodies, sounding voices re-eminating through the audi, releasing sound effects and songs from the PA system.for without ALL of you. there would've been no show, No skit.No victory.

True, that others may think we don't deserve it really.but we got it right? we won.We did our best.and we triumphed.

We followed the rules.We played with our strength.We gave them what we had, with joy and determination.And THAT is probably the best reason why we shouldn't look back and ponder about on this date with negative thoughts.We Should look back at this play, this day, this moment with a sense of releif and joy.We made it through.

All of us.As a team.Not as individuals, but as a team.One big dysfunctional humorous clan of deranged friends.

and so this post is for you.
all this words I just wrote are for you.
My fellow classmates.
My friends.
Thank you.

The 'o' great one.

2008-11-13T19:44:00.000+08:00

she sits by the window,
counting cars passing by,
sitting there warming her chair,
grin plastered onto place.

If you were to call her
she would turn her head
and look at you, with
a smile gracing her face.

lighting up the whole of her face,
her surroundings,
and others.

her infectious laugh
and lame jokes,
brings everybody joy.

though I don't think ... she knows.
that she is treasured, that people care.
that she doesn't need to prove anything
that she doesn't need to whole face.

no I don't think you know.

Acceptance.

2008-11-12T19:54:00.005+08:00

It is not just smiling when everything's okay.
It is not just laughing over happy moments.
It is not just crying over fights.

It is not just missing the other.
It is not just mere infatuation.
It is not just feeling content.
It is not just feeling lost.

It is so much more than that.

It is acceptance of a whole.
It is patience, in the impossible situations.
It is wit, at the sharpest moments.
It is smile, in the inconsistency.
It is laughter, in the most worst scenario.
It is understanding, in the unbelievable.
It is honesty, through a lie.
It is truth, in the unfaithful.
It is soft, in the harshest environment.

It is there, even when gone.

It is to know you don't have a chance to make it through.

and yet.

hope against fate.

and yet.

still take the leap of faith.

and yet.

still understand the flaws.

and yet.

Love.

Love.
is knowing when to let go.
and accept it.

That is love, of which kind?
I do not know.

heroes season 3

2008-11-07T15:48:00.001+08:00

I WAS SHOCKED.

A few questions running amok in my head... was..
Sylar's good?
Claire is going to be bad?
what does Claire mean she's always Loved Peter?
Nathan and Peter are related to Sylar??
huuhhhh???

O.o..

The Ice Queen.

2008-11-04T21:07:00.009+08:00

She steps down Her throne; abruptly,
and whips around like wind,
the sound echoing in your mind.
She screams at you,
shouting your faults and blame,
making your eardrums burst.
you stare at Her mouth,
forming words with the wrong accent,
you smirk inwardly,for She lacked skill.
your face a blank,remains a blank
as She obliges you to
a slap; a resounding snap.
She towers with power,
brandishing blow by blow
with a warrior's scream; as if you were the enemy.
She stops,so you can breathe for regret,
so you can feel for remorse.
Then starts all over again.
you could taste iron,
breathing in the metal taste,you are
tempted to puke,and you do.She screams.
Her weapon, lethal in Her hand
hits you,physically scarring.
as She hovers above your remains,
She whispers in the air,with truth
and certainty.you shiver and kneel,
the whisper carried around in the night.
Her breathless comment,stops your breathing.
you finally feel something in you,
yet you gulp down the lump.
She turns and stalks Her way
to Her throne, and it is as before
with Her.you creep to your prison
and chain yourself with the chain.
And as you lay your head,
Her whispers haunt you,
wide awake in sleep,you lay there.
waiting for another day,

to start all over again-

Ah alack alack.I think I have a writer's block.

2008-11-04T19:23:00.004+08:00

Tick Tock;

goes the clock.

She stares at it;
Hearing the beat.
Like a drum, playing beats
Plotting the way for melody to ensue.

All around her,are noise
so she focuses on the beat:
Swathing ways for her to think;
Through the chaos of her thoughts.

She smiles,her upper lip arching upwards
and teeth meeting the lower,
and chews on it hard; drawing out blood.

Ironic.

Inspiration hits her
and she visibly brightens,
typing a few words,
clicking away.

But:-
then she frowns, biting on her lips
again.her eyebrows rise above the
wavy line of her fringe.nose scrunched.
Mouth pursed in distaste.

She hits a few keys;then
laying back on her chair,
exasperated she sighs.
Unsatisfied.

again she slumps and stares,
at the clock.focusing on the beat,
closing in on it.Desperate;
to find a way out of the writer's block.

made on 3-11-2008 4 a.m.

2008-11-03T05:16:00.003+08:00

The air was filled with a symphony at work,
it starts
at the wave of her pen,
The first few notes stream line out;
giving out a melody
awkward and soft,
Then comes the point,
where silence rules all.
her pen stops.
she puts the end to her mouth.
she can not taste the ink
slowly seeping
filling her mouth
lulling her senses
but no
what was once known was now unknown
No melody is heard,the beat lost;

for now-

what we don't need.

2008-11-01T06:23:00.002+08:00

When did being broken become a good thing? I’ve noticed, recently, how many people are famous because they were broken people once and “fixed themselves”. Or how many books are about broken childhoods, how many people claim they care “about all of the broken people out there”.

They say it with tears running down their faces, but there is this smile on their face. Not a smile of peace or forgiveness, though. It is the same smile they use when they talk about their wife having a baby or their newest book.

If they only knew, they wouldn’t smile like that. But, perhaps, they would still cry. It wouldn’t matter if they did. We don’t need their tears.

New Blog New posts.

2008-11-01T06:20:00.000+08:00

This is a new blog since my old blog is precurring such a long scene of being stubborn.I have resolved to a new (and hopefuly better) blog.:).as you may see.I posted old posts from my Other blog here.but after this post.I swear it'll all be new.ja mata.;)

yours truly
qeel

Beep.

2008-11-01T06:19:00.001+08:00

White walls.White floor.
White door.White People.
A building filled with white.
Has a white room.

No Sunshine shone throught the shiny windows.
No sound of happiness could be heard.
No rumbles of laughter.
No Sight of a smile.

Just a monotone of a beep.
Weak,faint.but there.
Feeble and unstable.
There.

Annoying beep.
Inconsistent.
Irritable.
There.

The beep;a welcoming sound.

Tempted.

2008-11-01T06:18:00.001+08:00

“What do you do when you’re standing on a precipice with nowhere to go but down? If I fall, if I surrender myself to the rain, the chill, the night… who will catch me?”

Faith in a friend.

2008-11-01T06:15:00.000+08:00

Faith is nonsensical by nature, and foolhardy.
Faith is a belief that does not rest on logical proof, and until one understand that such is possible, one will never be able to move forward.
But faith in a friend, is not ridiculous.
Have Faith.

A hardcore romantic's Quotes.

2008-11-01T06:12:00.000+08:00

You laugh because I'm different; I laugh because you're all the same

To the world your just one person but to one person you could mean the world

Our eyes are placed in front because it is more important to look ahead than to look back

Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened

Everyone is entitled to be stupid but you are abusing that privilege

Did the sun just come out or did you just smile at me?

There's a light at the end of every tunnel, just pray it's not a train.

You know your in love when the hardest thing to say is goodbye.

Love is ... Running into his arms, Colliding with his heart, And exploding into his soul.

831-8 letters, 3 words, 1 meaning, I love you

Lust Is When You Love What You See. Love Is When You Lust For What's Inside

The "WHY" post.

2008-11-01T06:06:00.002+08:00

"Why? WHY? WHY?!"

Ms Ani went on parade withe the "whys" today. She said by repeating the word signals the evergrowing anger or frustration.why ? why...? then she blabbered about something about the poem But I zoned out.

I don't know why. Ms Ani but I zoned out.

My imagination went overdrive (questions and answers popped into my brain) :

Why is he repeating "wherefore"?
Coz he ran out of other fancy words to stun the world with.

Why do you talk w/o thinking?
Coz all of my Brain Cells are denatured.

Why are you grinning?
Coz my sanity is still missing

Why aren't you thinking?
Like I said MY BRAIN CELLS ARE DEAD.

Why was he rebellious?
Coz he wanted to be an emo.but back then they didn't have spikes and mascara for guys.

Why are you snickering?
Coz I can make that sound seem more sinister.

Why are you all smiling?
Coz we want you to run out of our classroom like a madwoman.

Why are you all groaning?
Coz we can see a pole jutting out of your butt.

and many more. indecent.remarks.

A/n: Okay.I am seriously tempted to make a new "why" post.